34: How to Be Brave in Love After You’ve Been Hurt

Love Life with Matthew Hussey

Matthew Hussey

Relationships, Society & Culture

4.8 • 2.9K Ratings

🗓️ 1 July 2020

⏱️ 5 minutes

🔗️ Recording | iTunes | RSS

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Summary

Have you ever been hurt badly by someone in love? Those wounds can stay with us a long time.

They can stop us from taking chances again in love.

They can make us afraid of getting close to someone again…

Afraid of being vulnerable again…

Afraid of letting someone in…

Because if the result of letting our guard down and choosing to love someone is that we give up all of our power, then why bother, right?

Sure, we may be giving up the special experience of being in love, but at least we don’t have to experience those dreadful lows. If you can relate to this, today’s episode is for you.

You’ll hear me doing a live demonstration with someone who is going through exactly this issue. And what I tell her may be exactly the words you need to hear right now.

This isn’t isn’t a pep talk.

It’s a rational, practical strategy for how to navigate your love life after someone has hurt you, or broken your heart or your trust (or all 3).

►► Be Brave and Invest in Love Again. To Learn How, Download Your FREE Guide… → http://www.3SecretsToLove.com

Transcript

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0:00.0	MUSIC
0:01.8	MUSIC
0:28.3	Thank you so much for calling in. What was your question, Christine?
0:32.7	So I always open up myself and I'm very vulnerable, but as soon as
0:40.2	they try to like, you know, take action and they show that they care
0:44.6	back, I tend to pull away and I start to like, not want to commit.
0:50.2	Even though like consciously like I want to and I don't know if it's
0:54.2	so conscious being an a human exclusive or what are you afraid of?
1:00.0	He's gonna hurt me and what happened last time is going to happen again.
1:05.0	And what happened last time?
1:07.9	I was completely committed and I put too much of myself into the relationship
1:13.6	when he wasn't giving enough back.
1:16.0	And I just don't want that to happen again.
1:19.1	So let me ask you, let me ask you a question, Christine, what lesson did you
1:22.6	learn from that relationship? What did you take the lesson to be from that
1:27.1	time that you got hurt? What did it teach you? Did it teach you?
1:30.1	I hope you're in touch with your mentee and I shouldn't give way more than I get
1:35.6	back.
1:36.5	That's the logical lesson you took.
1:39.6	But the emotional lesson you took was quite different from that.
1:43.0	Because that's if you say it out loud, that sounds very, very normal, very
1:47.2	reasonable. But if you actually look at your behavior, it probably
	...

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