332. Intent vs. Impact in Widowhood
The Widowed Mom Podcast
Krista St-Germain
4.9 • 695 Ratings
🗓️ 6 October 2025
⏱️ 15 minutes
🧾️ Download transcript
Summary
Have you ever had someone say, “You're so strong” or, “They're in a better place now” and felt... worse? These well-meaning comments, though intended to comfort, often leave us feeling misunderstood and alone in our grief journey.
Sometimes the people who love us most can hurt us without meaning to. This disconnect between what someone intends and how their actions affect us shows up everywhere in widowhood. And understanding this gap between intention and impact can transform how we navigate grief and relationships.
Tune in this week as I explore the concept of intent versus impact and how it plays out in widowhood. You'll discover how to validate your experience without having to villainize anyone's intentions, and why this distinction matters for your healing.
Get full show notes, transcript, and more information here: https://www.coachingwithkrista.com/332
Transcript
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| 0:00.0 | Welcome to the Widowed Mom Podcast, episode 332, intent versus impact in widowhood. |
| 0:10.2 | Welcome to the Widowed Mom podcast, the only podcast that offers a proven process to help you work through your grief to grow, evolve, and create a future you can truly look forward to. |
| 0:24.2 | Here's your host, Master Certified Life Coach, Grief Expert, Widow, and Mom, Krista St. Germain. |
| 0:32.9 | Hey there, welcome to another episode of the podcast. How are you doing? It's October. By the time |
| 0:40.7 | you are listening to this, I'm recording it at the end of September, but by the time you hear it, |
| 0:44.3 | it will be October. Starting to feel more like fall. The weather's, I think, going to cool off |
| 0:50.3 | a little bit more. It's actually been really nice, so I cannot complain at all. I just finished |
| 0:57.2 | a master's retreat with my mom goes on master's members, and the impetus for this podcast episode |
| 1:04.7 | actually came about in that retreat. First of all, I love retreats. They're like my favorite thing to do. Well, that's not true. |
| 1:13.2 | They're one of my favorite things to do. But it's really fun to guide people through an experience and |
| 1:18.1 | spend time with people who are interested in the kind of work that I do and want to love life and |
| 1:24.2 | those kinds of things. So I already love the retreat, but it came up as we were |
| 1:28.1 | exploring rules that we had picked up, specifically in childhood growing up, right, rules that we had |
| 1:34.7 | picked up along the road of life. And one of my clients noticed a rule that she had kind of inherited |
| 1:42.5 | from her parents. And she noticed how that rule was still |
| 1:48.0 | kind of holding her back in terms of the way that she wanted to express herself. And so that rule was |
| 1:54.0 | something about it's important to be agreeable. And she knew she learned that from her parents, |
| 1:59.2 | and then she could kind of see how she was still |
| 2:02.0 | holding on to that rule and she didn't really want to hold onto that rule anymore because there |
| 2:07.4 | were times when she was editing herself, censoring herself, and she didn't really want to do that |
| 2:11.5 | so much. But then later, as she thought about it, she started to feel guilty because she didn't |
| 2:16.8 | believe her parents met any harm |
... |
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