330. When You and Your Partner Are Moving At Different Speeds: A Conversation with Dr. Alexandra Solomon
UnF*ck Your Brain: Feminist Self-Help for Everyone
Kara Loewentheil
4.6 • 5.5K Ratings
🗓️ 22 February 2024
⏱️ 44 minutes
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Summary
Is your partner wanting to move faster or slower than you to meet certain relationship milestones? We’ve been taught to see moving at different speeds than your partner as a huge red flag. However, Dr. Alexandra Solomon - a best-selling author, therapist, speaker, expert in the study of relationships, and my guest this week - believes pace discrepancies allow us to work on essential relational skills. She’s here to uncover the complexities that our relationships demand and share her top tips for opening up communication with your partner on this topic.
Get full show notes and more information here: https://schoolofnewfeministthought.com/330
Transcript
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| 0:14.6 | Welcome to UnFuck Your Brain, feminist self-help for everyone. Brought to you by the school of new feminist thought. I'm your host, Kara Loyuthile, Harvard lawyer turned life coach extraordinary, and I'm here to help |
| 0:20.4 | you get society's sexist messages out of your brain so you can be confident, |
| 0:25.6 | feel powerful, and live a life you won't regret when you die. |
| 0:30.3 | If you want to jumpstart that process, you need to grab my totally free guide to feeling less anxious and more empowered by rewiring your brain. |
| 0:39.0 | Just text your email to Plus 1, 347, 997, 1784 and use code word brain or go to UnFuck Your Brain. |
| 0:50.0 | Now let's get to today's |
| 0:55.0 | get to today's episode. |
| 1:00.0 | Okay y'all today's interview conversation is like one of my favorites I've ever done because the |
| 1:06.1 | topic we're going to be talking about, which is when you and your partner are at kind of different |
| 1:10.4 | speeds in your relationship, something that my guest Dr. Solomon calls a |
| 1:14.1 | pace discrepancy is like a complete, I think we called it a node in the episode, but you could |
| 1:20.3 | also just call it a complete cluster fuck of like social programming, |
| 1:25.1 | social expectations, socialized anxiety, what women are taught is their worth and purpose and |
| 1:31.1 | value in the world? |
| 1:32.5 | Bad pop psychology. |
| 1:34.2 | It's just like, it's so good. |
| 1:35.8 | It's such a rich, rich area. |
| 1:37.6 | It reminds me of like my life in academia |
| 1:39.4 | where you would pick kind of one somewhat small thing |
| 1:41.6 | and then you can just like extrapolate everything from it and see a microcosm of the world in it. |
| 1:46.3 | So it's such a good conversation and Dr. Solomon is just wise and hilarious and a wonderful person to be in conversation with. I did an episode on her podcast all about the book. That was also amazing. So excited for you to listen to this. |
| 1:58.0 | One of the things we talk about in the episode is the ways in which the anxiety that society teaches women about |
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