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Ari Shaffir's Skeptic Tank

#313: Row, Row, Row Your Boat Gently Across The Fucking Atlantic Ocean (with Tim Crockett @RowAtlantic)

Ari Shaffir's Skeptic Tank

Ari Shaffir

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4.66.7K Ratings

🗓️ 16 January 2018

⏱️ 153 minutes

🧾️ Download transcript

Summary

Tim Crockett met me in Athens, Georgia to tell me about the monumental feat he is undertaking. Tim is going to row, BY HIMSELF, across the Atlantic Ocean. He'll be miles from the nearest boat or assistance. He'll have limited supplies. The guy is absolutely crazy in the best way possible. Come along to hear how he's going to do it.

Transcript

Click on a timestamp to play from that location

0:00.0

Has anybody ever died doing this?

0:02.0

In total of... like combine the whole ocean rowing as a sport, I think there's been seven deaths

0:14.0

or life-slostersy. A few of those have gone missing and never recovered. There have been a few

0:20.0

that have... folks have died, a ball whether it's exposure, heat or cold injuries, but yeah,

0:27.0

in film seven, I think.

0:29.0

Well, you're not worried about that?

0:31.0

No, I'm sure.

0:33.0

You walk out here by bus and...

0:35.0

Yeah, because that's probably higher.

0:57.0

We can't roll, roll, roll, roll, roll, roll, roll, roll, roll, roll, roll, roll, roll.

1:04.0

You used to be paper-plopper, the cat of every ball.

1:09.0

Now listen, little popper, and I'm head-to-big down fall, cause I ain't no way to lose

1:15.0

this shit ball we can roll, roll, roll, roll, roll, roll, roll, roll, roll, roll, roll, roll, roll, roll, roll, roll, roll, roll, roll, roll, do you know what I mean?

1:35.0

I'm watching this, uh, I'm watching this Viking Saints game.

1:39.0

And the Vikings, the Vikings hit a fucking touchdown with no time left.

1:47.0

A crazy 61-yard pass to win the game. Mayhem, fucking Bedlam. Everybody's losing their minds.

1:57.0

Celebration, fucking presses out there interviewing people and this goddamn ref has to go.

2:03.0

Hey guys, come on. We have to kick the extra point. By rule, we must, we must kick the extra point.

2:11.0

As if it's a fucking, as if it's JFK's funeral and they got a fucking go through the motions.

2:17.0

Nobody gives a shit, man. How about just, you can't even tie it with a block two point conversion and return.

2:23.0

How about just, look at fucking digs posing on the bench, standing up for the, I don't care.

2:31.0

Crossed. We must, ladies and gentlemen, I'm so sorry. We must do this. Honor, honor dictates.

...

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