You're listening to On attachment, a place to learn about how attachment shapes the way we experience relationships and where you'll gain the guidance, knowledge and practical tools to

overcome insecurity and build healthy thriving relationships. I'm your host,

relationship coach Stephanie Rigg and I'm really glad you're here.

Hey everybody, welcome back to another episode of on attachment in today's

episode we are doing three tips for avoidant attaches during conflict so if you

listened last week I did sort of part one of this topic which was three tips for anxiously

attach people during conflict and as promised I'm coming back with part two this

week which is around avoidant attachment and some steps that avoid and attaches can take to shift the status quo in

conflict in your relationships. As I spoke to last week we all contribute to

these patterns even if we feel like it's really easy to blame the other person

You know if they didn't do their thing I wouldn't do my thing but that tends to be true on both sides and that is good news because it means that we have more power over changing the patterns

than maybe we realize. So today's episode is going to be sharing some

pointers for avoidant people in conflict with your partner so that you can hopefully

have more productive conversations where you can really hear each other and get to a resolution

that is mutually satisfactory quicker maybe than you tend to.

I know that for Avoidant attaches one of the big gripes with their anxious partners is having conversations that go on for hours and hours

and I know that they can feel excruciatingly painful and can really feed into your

resistance to talking about relationship stuff more broadly because you feel like every

time you open the can of worms it's signing up for one of those big drawn-out long emotional conversations that are so taxing for you.

So hopefully with these few tips today you can short circuit some of that and maybe find a new way of doing things that allows both

you and your partner to get what you need out of those conversations rather than swirling

around in them endlessly.

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