3 Empowering Mantras For Abuse & Betrayal Victims
Betrayal Trauma Recovery
Anne Blythe, M.Ed.
4.7 • 1.5K Ratings
🗓️ 19 September 2023
⏱️ 26 minutes
🧾️ Download transcript
Summary
Dr. Stephanie Powell is back on the BTR.ORG podcast sharing powerful words of healing and love for victims. Tune in to the podcast and read the full transcript for more.
"I Am Enough"
It goes back again to us women really realizing that who we are is enough, regardless of whether we have someone in our life or we don't. We're going to be okay. What you don't want is to have someone that you trust and love use everything that you've told him against you - because you're not there for him to use it against you.
When I was in law enforcement, I came on when there weren't that many females. And so there was a lot of obstacles with that. But I had this saying on my desk that I actually heard from Oprah Winfrey that says, 'What you say about me is none of my business.' Think about that for one moment. 'What you say about me is none of my business.' In other words, I can't invest in that negativity.
Dr. Stephanie Powell
One way that abusive men exploit victims is by conditioning women to believe that they are intrinsically not enough - and need the abuser to complete them or validate their existence and worth.
Will you tell yourself, "I am enough" today?
"People Have to Earn my Trust and Love"
As women, we are often conditioned from birth to offer unconditional trust and love. It's vulnerable and brave to participate in relationships, but utilizing this mantra can help victims to engage in only healthy relationships.
Will you give yourself the gift of allowing others to earn your trust and love, rather than offering it unconditionally?
"What happened to me is not my fault."
It's so easy to blame ourselves for abuse and betrayal.
* I wasn't enough for my husband
* I bring out the worst in him
* I should've known
* I should've been better
* I should've left sooner
"The bottom line is, whatever has happened to you is not your fault. You learn from it, you move forward."
Dr. Stephanie Powell
Abuse is never the victim's fault. You are not to blame. Please offer yourself the grace and healing that comes with embracing the mantra:
"What happened to me is not my fault. I will learn from this. I will give myself compassion."
BTR.ORG Supports You
We know how difficult it can be to practice self-love and compassion after experiencing betrayal and abuse. Please find the support you deserve in our BTR.ORG Group Sessions.
Full Transcript:
Anne (00:00):
Dr. Stephanie Powell is back on today's episode. If you didn't listen to the beginning of our conversation last week, start there and then join us here. We're just going to jump right in.
When it comes to sexual exploitation and sex trafficking, can you talk to us about some lessons that you learned from your experience that would be relevant to this audience?
"I assumed they were there because they wanted to be there"
Dr. Stephanie Powell (00:23):
In terms of my experience when I first was running my vice unit, I thought that when I'd see the women walking up and down the street on their phones and hardly having anything on and they're laughing in the phone, I assumed that they were there because they wanted to be there. That's what they wanted to do. But when I started working with them, not only in my law enforcement end of it, but in the advocate end of it, I quickly learned that these women, some of them were doing it because, and I'm going to talk about the ones who felt that they had a relationship. I think people can understand this.
Transcript
Click on a timestamp to play from that location
| 0:00.0 | Welcome to BTR.org. This is Ann. No matter what you're going through right now, |
| 0:05.9 | no matter if you thought things were under control, no matter if you have a holiday coming up or you're |
| 0:12.1 | Unvecation, or it's just a regular time of year. No matter if you had hope that things would get better. |
| 0:18.6 | If you realize you're back to square one, if you find yourself needing support, we're here. |
| 0:25.6 | If you're new to the BTR podcast, you may want to consider starting with the oldest episodes first and then working your way forward chronologically. |
| 0:32.8 | If you do that, you'll hear a change in my voice as I grow in my confidence and skills. |
| 0:38.4 | Before we get to today's episode, there are a lot of so-called betrayal trauma therapists or coaches or groups out there, |
| 0:45.2 | but they don't approach pornography use or infidelity as an abuse issue. |
| 0:50.7 | Here at BTR.org, we do, and we know how to help you. |
| 0:54.8 | No matter where you are on your journey to a peaceful, stable home, |
| 0:58.8 | every when needs to know the foundational principles for strategic communication with an abuser, |
| 1:04.0 | so you can make real progress toward emotional safety. |
| 1:06.9 | We've developed the BTR.org Living Free Workshop to teach you these life-changing principles. |
| 1:12.5 | To get up to date information about when this workshop runs, |
| 1:15.9 | go to our website btr.org scroll to the bottom and join our community. |
| 1:20.4 | BTR.org coaches who run our daily group sessions are not only professionally trained in trauma and abuse, |
| 1:27.2 | they've lived through it themselves. They get it. |
| 1:30.9 | BTR group sessions run every day, and when you gain access, you have at least 21 plus sessions a week to choose from. |
| 1:38.8 | Our group sessions are for women victims of emotional and psychological abuse and sexual coercion, |
| 1:44.6 | so if you're experiencing physical assault of any kind or you're aware that your husband has |
| 1:48.8 | committed a crime, rather than share about that in our group sessions, contact your local law |
| 1:54.7 | enforcement and domestic violence services. But if you're like the majority of our listeners, |
... |
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