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ADHD reWired

290 | Surviving Childhood with "Sarah Edgewood"

ADHD reWired

Eric Tivers, LCSW, ADHD-CCSP

Mental Health, Health & Fitness, Education

4.8937 Ratings

🗓️ 1 October 2019

⏱️ 59 minutes

🧾️ Download transcript

Summary

Sarah grew up in urban poverty with domestic violence, alcohol, drugs, and all before she turned 14. She had a hard time in school and with making friends, but her tenacity got her through, she ended up graduating from college with an MBA in finance. For the last 11 years, she has had a career in higher education. She discusses her childhood, the abuse, and being diagnosed with ADHD, OCD, and depression. She tells us why her son hasn't seen his grandparents in 4 years, and why she hasn't told her family about the way her father treated her. Stories like Sarah's need to be told so that maybe her words can help someone heal. She is a strong, resilient woman because of and in spite of her upbringing. Listen in as she explains how she feels and why she feels like it was her fault. I am sure there are people we know who this will resonate with maybe suggest that they listen to this episode with you. Your Resources: Brene Brown Russel Barkley Books on ADHD Driven to Distraction by Edward Hallowell NAASCA AL-ANON You'll Learn: 02:49] Welcome to the show, Sarah! [03:25] Eric and Sarah discuss her childhood and growing up a victim of domestic violence by her father. [05:41] Mental Health in her family is never discussed. [06:32] How is your relationship with your dad now? Do you have one? [07:43] She tells us about an incident when she was caught holding hands with a boy walking down the street, and her father reacted violently against her. [09:55] Her dad's brother was the only one that knew what happened and he was an alcoholic. [10:40] She thinks that people would think it's strange that she has a good relationship with her dad. [11:27] Sarah speaks to us about her father threatening her son; he no longers sees his grandparents. [13:23] Have you ever felt that if you tell someone about the abuse, it will blow up everything you have tried to build? [17:20] You can't numb the hard stuff if you want to feel the good stuff. [18:39] Have you ever sat in the muck? How long did it take you to get out? [19:20] Sarah speaks about her and trying to deal with her suicidal feelings. [21:20] If you could go back and talk to your 10-year-old self, what would you say? [25:41] No one will ever know how awful and painful this was for Sarah, but it is ok to have strong feelings and to see that it wasn't her fault. [27:33] Once she was diagnosed, everything started making more sense. Why wasn't this diagnosed years sooner? [29:48] Sarah reminisces about staying up all night with her mom watching tv and cooking 3-course meals at midnight. [33:30] Shame grows with silence, secrecy, and judgment. [38:10] It took Sarah 10 years to get her undergrad degree, and she got her MBA after she had her son. [40:40] She tells us about a guy she dated in high school that was controlling that she stayed with for four years. She failed classes because he followed her to college and stalked her. [45:46] Even the most resilient people need to stop and take a minute to say, this is hard! [47:00] How has the adversity you have faced shaped your ability to show up for life's challenges now? [49:52] Sarah says sometimes you have to be ok with not always being ok. [50:40] Eric's hope for Sarah is that she will continue working with her therapist and continue to tell her story and keep healing. [51:58] Eric will put some more resources on his website. [53:03] If you're a regular listener, consider becoming a patron and on our Patreon at www.ADHDreWired.com Use my Audible.com affiliate link for your favorite titles: http://www.audibletrial.com/ADHDreWired ADHD reWired Coaching and Accountability Groups The 16th season of the ADHD reWired Coaching and Accountability groups are ending soon. ArC 17 Summer Sessions run July 11th – Sept. 19th. We only have 9 spots remaining. Please visit coachingrewired.com to learn more and sign-up for our Last Scheduled Registration Event on June 11th at 3 PM CT. You don't want to miss it! Support the Podcast on Patreon Patreon allows listeners like you to support content creators like me. With a monthly contribution, you can get access to different levels of perks. One perk example is our Patron-only Group Coaching Sessions. Learn more at http://patreon.com/adhdrewired. ADHD reWired Facebook Group: If you would like to apply to join the ADHD reWired Secret Facebook group, go to https://www.adhdrewired.com/community and fill out the application. Productivity Q&A Get your ADHD questions answered live! These Q&A sessions take place on the 2nd Tuesday of every month at 12:30 PM CT. Go to https://www.adhdrewired.com/events Want to be a guest? Hey! What about you? Do you have a story? Are you a coach? Are you an ADHD Clinician? If you answered yes to any of these questions and you'd like to be a guest, schedule a pre-interview call here.

Transcript

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0:00.0

Hey everyone.

0:01.0

Before we start today's interview, I just want to offer a trigger warning for this episode,

0:05.1

especially for anyone who might be a survivor of childhood trauma or abuse.

0:11.7

For additional resources, check out the National Association of Adult Survivors of

0:16.8

Child Abuse website. You can find that at N-A-A-S-C-A.

0:24.0

I want to share my story more.

0:26.6

Just I want to help other people.

0:28.8

And yeah, I'm not fully healed. I do have a gaping wound that sometimes, you know, every once in a while it seeps and

0:38.6

ideal and I feel it and Icy ball sometimes or the energy

0:45.0

I always keep going I feel like a bouncy ball sometimes or the energizer bunny

0:49.8

just get back up. You have to.

0:54.0

A. D. Rewired episode, 290.

0:59.0

This is the podcast for those of us with really good intentions and a slightly wandering attention.

1:05.9

I'm America Tivirs. I'm a licensed clinical social worker by training and a coach by design.

1:10.6

I'm your host and I have ADHD.

1:13.0

ADHD rewired is more than just a podcast.

1:16.0

We are a community.

1:17.0

We are wired for connection and you are not alone.

1:20.0

Go to ADHD rewired.

1:22.0

com to learn how you can join us in our free secret

1:25.3

Facebook group. Get additional resources for every episode including links

1:28.8

to any resources we mentioned on today's show. You can support us on

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