275: Moooooove On & No, Sassy, No! (with Luke and Sassy Scott)
We're Here to Help
Headgum
4.9 • 4.5K Ratings
🗓️ 25 March 2026
⏱️ 72 minutes
🧾️ Download transcript
Summary
Luke and Sassy Scott join Jake and Gareth to whip some callers into shape. First, they set boundaries with a cow-loving boss. Then, they get into the smut business.
New episodes of "Luke and Sassy Scott Podcast" drop Wednesdays wherever you get your podcasts! It's chaos that brings you joy. No filter, zero shame, and nothing is off limits, with listener stories and voice notes driving the chaos every week. If you like comedy with a bit of heart and a lot of unhinged honesty, this is it.
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Transcript
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| 0:00.0 | This is a head gum podcast. |
| 0:05.0 | This is a head gum podcast. |
| 0:12.0 | This is a head gum podcast. |
| 0:16.0 | Two out. |
| 0:19.0 | Beer, weird, weird, weird, |
| 0:20.0 | two, two, two, two're, we're, we're, we're, we're, yeah, yeah, we're, too, too, too, out. |
| 0:25.7 | And sassy, Scott from the podcast. |
| 0:41.1 | Luke and Sassy Scott, is that correct? |
| 0:43.2 | Yeah. |
| 0:43.8 | And we met you guys years ago. |
| 0:46.8 | We were all in the Burt Kreischer podcast house. |
| 0:50.2 | Yes. |
| 0:51.1 | Oh, yes. |
| 0:52.5 | You guys were leaving and we were coming and we were in that weird house with like two kitchens. |
| 0:59.5 | And the dogs are RIP to one of these dogs now, but they were fucking, I don't know if they were like homophobic or. |
| 1:07.7 | They are. Famously. |
| 1:09.2 | There it is. Because I walked in, I was like, that fucking dog's going to kill me. It was just eyeing me off the whole time. And I'm like, I'm in Hollywood. I'm at birds a place. And fucking Jake Johnson's here. What the hell is going on? But the whole time this dog was just like looking at me like, you're mine, bitch. What were you doing back uh trying not to make eye |
| 1:30.3 | contact usually i stare anything down but one of those dogs i was like do not look exactly |
| 1:37.0 | once an animal i don't believe in the bullshit where they're like dogs can tell if you're a good |
| 1:42.8 | person or bad person sometimes dogs are just weird some dogs have a good read other dogs they're like dogs can tell if you're a good person or bad person. Sometimes dogs are just weird. Some dogs have a good read. Other dogs, you're like, you're just bullying and now I'm at this guy's house and everyone's partying. I don't like you. You don't like me. But you might bite me and I don't feel comfortable around you. Yeah. I want that dog out of here. God did that. |
| 2:01.9 | Everything nearly felt from Scott and I because I ignored Scott's dogs. It was put into a contract that I had to start patting them when I arrived at his house. You swear to God? Mm-hmm. That was in a contract? Luke, walk me through that. Luke, please walk me through that. When it got really bad for Scott and I, |
| 2:20.2 | he'd like to start pulling its straws, |
... |
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