Welcome to Ghost of a Podcast. I'm your host Jessica Lignato. I'm an

astrologer, psychic medium, an animal communicator, and I'm gonna give you your

weekly horoscope and no bullshit, mystical advice for living your very best life.

I am thrilled to have you join me today, Kat. Tell me what you would like a

reading about today. I'm wondering if my chart sheds any light on what I've

always felt as a deep split between my inner and outer life. Growing up as a white

girl in the south felt a lot of familial and social pressure to be out

going to police others and to be pleasant at all costs. I really felt the

internal pressure of this kind of lying and it could sense that there was

suffering behind it in myself and around me. And there was certainly

suffering in my family where there was depression and what I thought was

eccentricity but have now been given to understand as mental illness. So as a child

I was escaping to hiding places and create elaborate worlds in my imagination. As I

grew older I began to be attracted to other girls and this was in the 1950s and I

spent a lot of time in fantasy and imagination about these girls and of course

it could never be spoken or acted upon. All of this felt crazy and wrong and

certainly secret. In adulthood and now out I continued to feel the pressure to

be social so I felt self-absorbed and often judged in my preoccupation with my

mental health issues and have it for escaping into hiding and into fantasy

connection or solitary activities. Like meditation or doing things like spending

hours in a dark room making pictures. But being too much around others I feel

too porous and imagination and sensitivity can turn into paranoia and get

...