258: What Do Parents Need to Know About Teens & Fan Fiction?

Ask Lisa: The Psychology of Raising Tweens & Teens

Dr. Lisa Damour/Reena Ninan

Mental Health, Kids & Family, Health & Fitness, Parenting

4.7 • 824 Ratings

🗓️ 10 February 2026

⏱️ 28 minutes

🔗️ Recording | iTunes | RSS

🧾️ Download transcript

Summary

What would YOU do if you discovered your tween or teen was reading explicit fan fiction online? Today’s kids are often learning about sexuality through the internet, often long before parents realize it. How you respond can either shut down communication or open the door to thoughtful, values-based conversations that actually stick. In this episode of Ask Lisa: The Psychology of Raising Tweens & Teens, clinical psychologist Dr. Lisa Damour and journalist Reena Ninan tackle a question many parents are asking: Should we be worried about our kids reading explicit fan fiction? 💡 YOU’LL LEARN: - Why reading explicit fan fiction can be a common, developmentally typical form of exploration - How to talk with your teen about sexual content without shaming or lecturing - How to share your family’s values around healthy intimacy in ways teens can hear - When (and how) to set boundaries without damaging trust - The surprising upsides of fan fiction If you’re feeling confused, uneasy, or unsure about what your kid is encountering online, this episode offers calm, practical guidance to help you stay connected and parent with confidence. ________________ Ask Lisa: The Psychology of Raising Tweens & Teens is the essential podcast for parents seeking expert guidance, tested strategies, and psychological insights on raising kids, especially tweens and teens. Join renowned clinical psychologist Dr. Lisa Damour and former journalist and mom of two Reena Ninan as they explore real-life parenting challenges. Looking to learn more about how to boost kids’ resilience, build their confidence, or support their emotional well-being? Dr. Lisa and Reena have got you covered! Together they address listener questions about stress, anxiety, social media concerns, school pressures, and challenges in peer relationships. Each episode provides practical advice and science-backed solutions to help parents raise resilient, confident, and emotionally healthy kids. Tune in every week for the latest topics in parenting, child psychology, and family wellness. Get answers to your most pressing parenting questions. New episodes drop every Tuesday. ________________ Episode keywords: teens, fan fiction, explicit content, family communication, online safety, romantasy Podcast keywords: ask lisa podcast, dr lisa damour, reena ninan, psychology, parenting, podcast, teens, tweens, parenting teens, parenting tweens, teen parenting, tween parenting, parenting tips, parenting advice, positive parenting, parenting podcast, teen behavior, tween challenges, raising tweens, raising teens, parenting hacks, parenting help, family dynamics, kids podcast, mental health, teen mental health, attachment styles, emotional intelligence

Transcript

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0:00.0	Tell me a parenting issue everyone struggles with with tweens and teens, but no one talks about.
0:06.0	Rina, I think a lot of people feel like they just don't know how to connect to their kid anymore.
0:12.0	I'm Rina Nainan and welcome to Ask Lisa the psychology of raising tweens and teens.
0:17.0	And I'm Dr. Lisa DeMore.
0:19.0	We bring you science-back strategies for managing anxiety, discipline, intense emotions, and more.
0:24.6	We decode tough parenting issues with tips you can use right now.
0:28.6	So subscribe to Ask Lisa the psychology of raising tweens and teens and join our YouTube community today.
0:35.6	Just Google, Ask Lisa Podcast.
0:38.0	We're here to help you untangle family life.
0:43.3	Episode 258, what do parents need to know about teens and fan fiction?
0:53.9	I mean, you just got to tell people, Lisa, how the heck did we come up with today's episode?
0:59.8	Because we got the greatest letter. And it is something that has been on my mind over time. And then
1:05.2	every once in a while, you know, something I've been thinking about, then the perfect letter
1:09.2	lands in our inbox. And frankly,
1:11.1	I was so excited. I was so excited. It just makes me laugh that you had been tailing this already,
1:16.1	and then we get a letter in our inbox. I want to get right to it, because this is something I did not
1:21.4	expect we'd be taken out. Hi, Dr. Lisa. I just listened to your episode. My kid looked at porn. What Should I Do? And I found it very helpful. I hope you can answer this question. I found out that my 13-year-old son has been reading porn fiction on fictionpress.com and fanfiction.net. The novels are pretty graphic for an eighth grader. How can I approach my son? Should I? My husband says he's
1:45.9	okay with it, but I do not feel comfortable. I am concerned. Thank you for your help.
1:51.8	First off, what the heck is this, Lisa? Okay, I'm really glad you're asking because I think for a lot of
1:57.0	families, this is something that kids know about, but the parents themselves don't know about,
2:01.1	and it's actually important to orient yourself to it. Okay, so here's the bottom line. There are
2:05.7	these online platforms. The two that were mentioned in the letter are good examples where people,
	...

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