258: Parenting as Prevention With Dr. Camilo Ortiz and Four D’s

Soberful

Veronica Valli & Chip Somers

Mental Health, Health & Fitness, Education, Self-improvement

4.8 • 611 Ratings

🗓️ 20 March 2024

⏱️ 41 minutes

🔗️ Recording | iTunes | RSS

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Summary

As part of our parenting as Prevention series, Dr. Ortiz joins Veronica to discuss the four D's: Discomfort, distress, disappointment, and (mild) danger and how our kids need to manage these feelings in order to learn vital life skills as adults. Director of clinical training and associate professor of psychology, Dr. Ortiz conducts research on parenting, disruptive behavior problems in children, and child anxiety. Dr. Ortiz received a Ph.D. in clinical psychology from the University of Massachusetts, Amherst, before joining the faculty at Long Island University-Post. Dr. Ortiz is a licensed psychologist in and runs a private psychology practice in NY. He has made a number of media appearances to bring evidence-based clinical psychology to a broader audience. His latest work, Independence Therapy for child anxiety was recently described in an op-ed piece he wrote for the NY Times. You can follow him on X @DrCamiloOrtiz.

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Transcript

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0:00.0	I dreamt that you were twisting through seven suns of gold and the gypsy was insisting
0:10.2	that story must be told I came two in the morning but I took it as a warning that you might be a treasure.
0:22.4	I could touch but never hold.
0:27.6	Hey, everybody, and welcome back to the Soberful podcast.
0:31.5	Today I'm continuing the series that we've started called Parenting as Prevention. And I am really thrilled to welcome
0:42.2	Dr. Camilo Ortiz to the show. Welcome. Thank you so much. I have been kind of internet stalking,
0:50.2	Dr. Ortiz. I found him on Twitter and I just really, really liked what he had to say about
0:56.6	parenting. So he is a professor of clinical psychology at Long Island University. And he is also
1:04.3	clinical psychologist who provide services for children, adolescents and adults. Now, we've had several people on the show talking
1:12.8	about parenting as prevention. So what is parenting as prevention? As a therapist and as a parent,
1:19.3	I'm really interested in how can we raise children that don't become addicted to substances
1:26.5	when they're adults,
1:30.6	because as a therapist, I believe all of this starts in childhood,
1:35.6	and we become addicted to substances as a way to manage our internal emotional lives.
1:40.3	We've had, I believe you know, we've had Lenore Skenezy on.
1:42.0	I believe you know each other, yeah.
1:45.2	She's talked about her model of parenting, pre-wrench parenting. We've had Dr. Laura Markham on, who's also excellent. We've had Jessica Leahy on,
1:50.2	talk about addiction-proofing our kids. And now I am so delighted to talk to you. Now, the reason
1:56.0	you caught my eye was you had a tweet about the four Ds. Could you explain what they are and why they're important?
2:05.2	Sure, sure. I'll just start by saying what they are and then we can talk about any aspect of
2:09.7	them that you'd like. So the four Ds are discomfort, distress, disappointment. And I always put in
2:17.0	parentheses, mild danger. And it's just sort of a catchy
	...

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