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Counselling Tutor

252 – Helping Clients with Trauma Bonding

Counselling Tutor

Ken Kelly and Rory Lees-Oakes

Education, Courses

4.6 β€’ 636 Ratings

πŸ—“οΈ 28 January 2023

⏱️ 48 minutes

🧾️ Download transcript

Summary

Changing Your Ethical Body - Using Empathy in Counselling In Episode 252 of the Counselling Tutor Podcast, your hosts Rory Lees-Oakes and Ken Kelly are back with this week's three topics: Up first in 'Theory in Practice', we'll take a closer look at helping clients with trauma bonding. Then in 'Practice Today', we discuss changing your ethical body. And lastly in 'Practice Matters', Rory speaks with Sally-Anne Armitage about the use of empathy in counselling. Helping Clients with Trauma Bonding [starts at 02:30 mins] Trauma bonding is when an individual, maybe in some kind of abusive relationship, either can't leave or keeps going back. The key features of this discussion on helping clients with trauma bonding include: This response to an abusive relationship is a natural survival strategy e.g. going back to the abuser. It's important to be patient, consistent and understanding of that process - try to alleviate the shame. A client within this relationship may be experiencing, gaslighting, emotional abuse, criticism, and/or violence. They may have thoughts such as 'it's my fault, not theirs' and defend their abuser. You should have patience and empathy for the victim. You need to tread carefully with trauma - it's not good to dig deep if you have not had proper CPD. When helping clients with a trauma bond, explain to them how the brain works - normalise their behaviours, help them to recognise there is not something wrong with them. Changing Your Ethical Body [starts at 16:03 mins] It can feel like a daunting task to change your ethical body, but Rory and Ken discuss the true ease of the change, and what you might want to consider when it comes to making that choice. The main points of this section include: It's important to find an ethical body that fits your values. It's actually a simple and painless process. Understand the value you're getting from your ethical body. There are 6 different bodies in the UK, just make sure the one you choose aligns with professional standards. Think what are the benefits, what are you offered, what do you gain access to, and how do they align with your way of working. If you choose to make a change to your ethical body, make sure you update this change with your insurer. Using Empathy in Counselling [starts at 28:57 mins] In this week's 'Practice Matters', Rory speaks with Sally-Anne Armitage about the use of empathy in counselling. The key points of this discussion include: Without empathy, there can't be a successful therapeutic relationship. Empathy isn't 'I've been through something similar and it gets better' - it's about putting your own frame of reference aside. Giving a reflection or paraphrasing are both good ways of being empathetic. When we reflect and paraphrase, the client can start to say more. It can allow them to open them up on their own terms. Try not to ask too many questions - this leads a person out of their own experience. The client will go from internal to external, telling you what youwant to know instead of what they want to tell. Observe tone of voice and body language, pay close attention to detail - is this telling you something different from the client's words? Ensure you create an atmosphere where the client can speak freely. Links and Resources Counselling Skills Academy Advanced Certificate in Counselling Supervision Basic Counselling Skills: A Student Guide Counsellor CPD Counselling Study Resource Counselling Theory in Practice: A Student Guide Counselling Tutor Shop Facebook group Website Online and Telephone Counselling: A Practitioner's Guide Online and Telephone Counselling Course

Transcript

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0:00.0

Today's episode of the counselling tutor podcast is sponsored by Webhealer. You're a counsellor in

0:07.6

private practice and you need a website or you've got an existing website which you need help with.

0:15.6

Webheeler are offering counselling tutor podcast listeners, that's you, 100 pounds off the cost of a website design and build.

0:24.4

Now, Webheeler specialise in websites for counsellors and psychotherapists.

0:28.5

It's what they do.

0:30.8

And the Webhealer team provide a completely non-technical done-for-you solution,

0:36.7

leaving you to focus your time on your clients.

0:40.6

Operating for 20 years, Webhealer are a trusted resource amongst counselors when it comes to

0:46.5

getting your practice online. So get the package details and claim your 100 pound off coupon for your new website by going to

0:57.6

counsellingtutor.com forward slash website. That's counsellingtutor.com forward slash website.

1:06.6

Welcome to the counselling tutor podcast. The must listen to podcast for students of counselling and psychotherapy.

1:17.5

Here are your hosts, Rory Lee's Oaks and Ken Kelly.

1:23.2

Hi, I'm Rory and with me as always is Ken. How are you doing, Ken?

1:28.0

I'm exceptionally well. Thank you for asking Rory. And both Rory and I hope that you are well.

1:33.0

You've joined us on the Counseling Tutor podcast, episode 252. Three stops on today's journey, starting off with theory and practice, where we look at how theory shows itself in the day-to-day practice of counselling and psychotherapy.

1:46.9

And today we're going to be speaking trauma bonding.

1:50.1

We then move on to practice today where we look at contemporary issues, challenges or wins

1:55.1

that we face in counseling.

1:56.8

And today we're going to be speaking about changing your ethical body. That's an interesting thing.

2:01.9

You know, we might change an insurer or a gas provider.

2:04.9

Do we change our ethical body?

2:06.4

We'll be discussing that.

...

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