250 - Why Betrayal Hurts Like a Physical Wound
Life Happens with Barb & Michelle
Michelle Maros & Barb Schmidt
4.9 • 1.1K Ratings
🗓️ 24 March 2026
⏱️ 45 minutes
🧾️ Download transcript
Summary
What happens when the person you trusted completely becomes the source of your deepest wound? And what does it mean when you're the one who caused that kind of pain for someone else?
In this episode of Life Happens with Barb & Michelle, our hosts go deep on one of the most universally painful human experiences: betrayal. This is a raw, honest conversation about what betrayal actually does to us, how it lives in our bodies, and what it really takes to move forward (hint: it's not just forgiving and forgetting).
💬 Barb opens up about how betrayal has quietly shattered her sense of safety and belonging over the years, including within family relationships, and shares what she's learning about the difference between repairing a relationship and repairing yourself.
💬 Michelle gets real about a time in her younger years when she found herself cast as the villain in a messy web of loyalty, secrets, and broken trust. She reflects on how she eventually made peace with it, even without resolution from the other people involved.
✨ In This Episode, We Discuss:
- Why betrayal isn't just disappointment and why it activates the same regions of the brain as physical pain
- The difference between a mistake and a betrayal, and why that line matters
- What it looks like to "clean up your own side of the street" after you've hurt someone
- The pressure of "blood is thicker than water" and why family loyalty doesn't obligate you to stay in unsafe relationships
- How to know whether a broken relationship is worth repairing or whether it's okay to let it go
- The sneaky way gossip can be a gateway to bigger betrayals
- What self-betrayal has to do with all of it (and why that's a whole other episode)
"What society thinks and what other people are telling you is true... blood is thicker than water, you have to forgive and forget... none of that applies. How do you feel about it?"
If you've ever felt like you had to choose between protecting someone and protecting yourself, this episode will meet you right there. You'll walk away with a clearer sense of what you actually owe other people and what you owe yourself. Come sit with us for this one.
📘 Go Deeper with Dear Friend
If this episode on Loyalty and Betrayal resonated with you, you may also love Michelle’s USA TODAY bestselling book, Dear Friend, a daily reflection companion designed to help you reconnect with your inner voice, honor your needs, and find clarity and strength one day at a time.
Because resilience doesn’t begin with changing your circumstances.
It begins with strengthening your relationship with yourself.
And that may be the most important relationship you’ll ever build.
👉 Order your copy: https://amzn.to/3Us9eqg
🎧 Listen to the audiobook and step into a year that truly loves you back: https://amzn.to/459zSdt
💬 We’d love to hear from you! What insight or moment resonated most with you in this episode? Share in the comments—we truly read every one.
📅 Subscribe & Join Us Next Tuesday for another heartfelt episode of Life Happens with Barb and Michelle! 💕
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Transcript
Click on a timestamp to play from that location
| 0:00.0 | What society thinks and what other people are telling you is true. You have to forgive and forget, or you can't blow up this relationship just because they said this or did this. |
| 0:08.7 | None of that applies. How do you feel about it? |
| 0:12.5 | What if the person you trusted the absolute most, the person that you never expected or imagined hurting you, became the source of your deepest pain. |
| 0:23.1 | Welcome to Life Happens with Barb and Michelle. Today we're going to dive into that exact |
| 0:28.2 | question and more. I'm so happy you're here with us. Hi, Mom. Hi, Michelle. Whoa, that was |
| 0:33.9 | that was something. Did that get you? Yeah, that was something something so we had a episode relatively recently this |
| 0:41.2 | within this year about loyalty and that really brought up a lot for people we had a lot of comments |
| 0:46.3 | questions insights and you and i have been talking a lot similarly about that topic and even more so the topic of betrayal. |
| 0:56.6 | Yes. |
| 0:57.5 | I think it feels like it's up for so many people because I can't even tell you how many comments. |
| 1:04.5 | Even not just on the episode itself that we did on loyalty, but even in social media. |
| 1:09.5 | I mean, I get so many DMs and comments about how to |
| 1:11.7 | deal with betrayal. What do you do when you feel betrayed? And I think this is a perfect opportunity, |
| 1:17.0 | and it feels good to be talking about betrayal because it kind of, yeah, because it just kind of feels like. |
| 1:22.0 | So dark. No, not so dark or anything, but I just feel like in some version, in some sense, |
| 1:27.0 | we all feel some |
| 1:28.0 | sense of betrayal and whatever that means to each and every one of us individually. And I think |
| 1:32.9 | it's, you know, like betrayal isn't just disappointment. I think that's the thing. I think sometimes |
| 1:38.0 | you talk a lot, Michelle, about spiritual bypassing and all that kind of stuff. You know, I think |
| 1:43.0 | that betrayal has, it's, it's so much more |
| 1:46.6 | than just disappointed, but sometimes we just kind of, it's deeper. And I think sometimes we just |
| 1:50.2 | kind of keep on going. Okay, I was betrayed and it hurt and all that. But I don't know if we really |
... |
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