23 Years of Secret Addiction: A Pastor's Shocking Recovery Story
Lights On with Carl Lentz
B-Side
4.8 • 797 Ratings
🗓️ 20 August 2025
⏱️ 69 minutes
🧾️ Download transcript
Summary
In this raw and unprecedented episode of Lights On, Carl Lentz sits down for an exclusive interview with Blaine Bartel, a former megachurch pastor who built one of America's largest youth ministries before losing everything due to a 23-year secret addiction. For the first time, Blaine opens up about the moment his double life was completely exposed, the "terrifying grace" that shattered his world in 24 hours, and the brutal honesty required to rebuild from absolute rock bottom. They discuss everything from the difference between recovery and resurrection, why churches abandon fallen pastors, and the uncomfortable truths about what really happens when ministry success collides with hidden shame. From the shock of losing his marriage and ministry to discovering what true freedom actually looks like, this conversation reveals how one man died to everything he was and found life again. Whether you're struggling with addiction, wondering if restoration is possible, or simply curious about what real redemption looks like, this interview offers hope without sugarcoating the cost. Warning: This episode contains discussions about sexual addiction, ministry failure, and the kind of honest conversations most people never have.
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Follow Carl at: https://www.instagram.com/carllentz/
Follow Blaine at: https://blainebartell.com/
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Supported by God Behind Bars https://godbehindbars.com
Supported by Plana https://plana.org/
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CHAPTERS:
00:00 - Blaine's Background: From Ministry Success to 23-Year Secret
03:33 - "God Issued a Warrant for My Soul" - Complete Exposure in 24 Hours
05:09 - "You'll Never Get Free" - The Doctor's Devastating Prediction
06:45 - Recovery vs Resurrection: The Moment Everything Changed
08:20 - "Jesus Makes Dead People Alive" - True Heart Transformation
10:45 - Death Before Resurrection: Why the Cross Comes First
12:43 - Why Pastors Fall So Hard and the Problem of Quick Comebacks
17:34 - GOD BEHIND BARS PARTNERSHIP
18:18 - The Loneliest Moment: When Everyone Cuts You Off
24:28 - Carl's Story: Being Completely Shunned by Hillsong Church
30:41 - Why Churches Choose Brand Protection Over Restoration
36:14 - The Day They Finally Lifted Their Heads Again
39:16 - PLANA.ORG PARTNERSHIP
40:16 - Jesus Washing Feet: The Vision That Changed Everything
43:37 - Understanding Addiction: The Three Greatest Fears of Every Man
48:31 - Brain Chemistry vs Willpower: Why "Moral Failure" Misses the Point
52:38 - Sacred Rituals: Bridging the Gap Between Inspiration and Transformation
59:15 - Vision for the Man vs Vision for the Career: What Really Matters
1:02:48 - How to Safeguard Your Life: Full-Throated Confession and Community
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Transcript
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| 0:00.0 | Blaine Bartel. |
| 0:01.0 | Carl Lenz. |
| 0:02.0 | Welcome to Lights on. |
| 0:04.0 | It's good to be here, brother. |
| 0:06.0 | It's amazing to have you. |
| 0:09.0 | Addiction, exposure, rebuilding, hope that transcends despair. |
| 0:18.0 | Right, right. |
| 0:20.0 | That's the conversation that we're going to dig into for those who may not know |
| 0:24.1 | can you give me a snapshot of the road as you've known like just maybe some context for |
| 0:32.3 | what your life used to look like maybe it's's what transpired, and then a little bit about |
| 0:38.6 | what you're doing now, and then we're going to get into this. |
| 0:41.4 | But I want people to know, you know, some of the background and context. |
| 0:46.6 | Okay. |
| 0:47.2 | Well, I'll hit the high points or the low points, but yes, I'm Canadian, grew up in Calgary, |
| 0:53.8 | came to Jesus when I was was 16 on fire for god |
| 0:57.9 | uh felt a call to the ministry when i was 18 and i met a guy named willie george uh a pastor in |
| 1:06.4 | uh Tulsa oklahoma so packed up moved my wife and wife and I to Oklahoma. We had this passion for student |
| 1:13.5 | ministry. We started somehow on a very shoestring budget, a television program for young people. |
| 1:22.8 | We kind of deemed it like the Saturday Night Live for Christians. |
| 1:28.3 | And it had sketches and, you know, back in the 80s and 90s, like Christian rock bands, |
| 1:34.2 | D.C. talk, all that kind of stuff. |
| 1:36.2 | So it blew up, Carl. |
... |
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