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Money For Couples with Ramit Sethi

229.  “I’m almost 50 and have nothing to show for my life”

Money For Couples with Ramit Sethi

Ramit Sethi

Relationships, Society & Culture, Investing, Business

4.63.1K Ratings

🗓️ 7 October 2025

⏱️ 103 minutes

🧾️ Download transcript

Summary

Christine (47) and Thad (57) have been together for more than six years, but instead of building wealth, they’re buried under nearly $340,000 of debt. Christine, the self-appointed “CFO,” is exhausted from tracking every bill, while Thad avoids the details and spends freely. Their conflicting money mindsets (Christine craving stability, Thad living for the moment) have stalled their big dreams like buying a home or taking Rich Life vacations that Christine longs for. With almost no savings and retirement looming, Christine fears she’s approaching 50 with nothing to show for her hard work, while Thad insists a single plan will solve everything. Can Ramit help them break the cycle of avoidance and control, align their priorities, and finally start acting like teammates? In this episode we uncover: • Why Christine feels she’s approaching 50 with “nothing to show” for her life • Thad’s $17,000 student loan that ballooned up to $125,000 • How Christine became the household “CFO” while Thad continues to avoid responsibility • Their real numbers—and why Christine feels so stressed • Christine’s frustration over micromanaging bills • Thad’s upbringing in poverty • The invisible power of shame and fear, and why they can’t see what’s right in front of them financially • Christine’s childhood lessons from parents who bought an unaffordable home • Thad’s stark admission: if nothing changes, he’ll be homeless Chapters: (00:00:00) When a worrier and an avoider meet… (00:02:59) “We have a plan… don’t we?” (00:15:52) “Where is all the money going?” (00:19:54) Ramit breaks down their numbers (00:33:46) “I never expected to live past 30” (00:48:30) “I wish my dad was able to say no” (00:56:33) “I don’t believe he’ll follow through” (01:05:11) “We need to be playing way bigger” (01:22:38) “I don’t feel like I have the power” (01:36:54) Where are they now? Christine and Thad’s follow-ups This episode is brought to you by: Doola | Go to https://doola.com.ramit and use code RAMIT for 10% off LLC formation and bookkeeping. Gelt | Book a tax consultation with Gelt at https://joingelt.com/ramit. As a member of my community, you can skip the waitlist. DeleteMe | If you want to get your personal information removed from the web, go to https://joindeleteme.com/ramit for 20% off. Masterclass | For unlimited access to every class and 15% off an annual membership, go to https://masterclass.com/ramit Netsuite | Download the CFO's Guide to AI and Machine Learning at https://netsuite.com/ramit Connect with Ramit • Get my new book, Money For Couples • Get Money Coaching with Ramit • Download the Conscious Spending Plan • Listen to my book—now on Audible • Get my New York Times best-selling book • Get my no-numbers journal • Other episodes • Instagram • Twitter • YouTube If you and your partner have a money issue and you want my help, I occasionally select a couple to work with, free of charge. Apply for my help here.

Transcript

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0:00.0

Okay, listen up. The schedule for the rest of my 2025 money coaching calls is out, and we have an

0:07.0

awesome lineup. On every call, I do a live breakdown of conscious spending plans, plus I answer

0:13.1

members' questions. So if you've been waiting to ask me a question about your finances,

0:17.8

this is your chance. Members also get access to the library of all past calls, plus our supportive money

0:25.0

coaching community and bonus course content that I don't post anywhere else.

0:28.9

If you've been looking for a sign to join my money coaching program, this is it.

0:34.0

Check out IWT.com slash money coaching to join right now. That's IWT.com

0:40.2

slash money coaching to join right now. I worry about our lack of retirement accounts and I worry

0:46.8

about our lack of savings. Since my savings account is at $101, we know I'm not saving.

0:52.1

I owe $125,000 to student loans on $17,000 principal.

0:58.4

The rest is interest.

0:59.8

We have been planning stuff.

1:01.9

We're making it plan.

1:02.8

Dad, you don't have a plan.

1:04.2

I'm 57 years old.

1:05.4

I'm only now on this point getting my finances and my stuff in order in life.

1:10.4

I ask him the same thing why he gets cash out. And I think it's so he can hide his spending so that it can't be tracked. Every dollar I have goes to this household, except for the money that I would waste it. This is not fair. You're not even married. I'm going to be 50 years old in three years, and it feels like I have nothing to show for my whole life.

1:28.3

Is it too late?

1:33.0

What if you didn't start saving or investing when you were in your 20s or 30s?

1:38.6

Today, we're about to get a look into this pressing question for tens of millions of Americans.

1:41.7

In today's episode, I speak with Christine and Thad.

1:47.2

She's 47, he's 57, and they do not have nearly enough money saved or invested to retire on time. Each have six-figure loans, which creates a toxic

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