#215: Thicker Than Water (@SteveSimeone)

Ari Shaffir's Skeptic Tank

Ari Shaffir

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4.6 • 6.7K Ratings

🗓️ 20 April 2015

⏱️ 119 minutes

🔗️ Recording | iTunes | RSS

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Summary

Steve Simeone had me over to his apartment to talk about family. I was there to get a ride to the airport to leave LA back to New York. It's a great discussion on blood with the guy who's probably closer to his family than any other comic I know. Check out Simeone's podcast, Good Times.

Transcript

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0:00.0	I remember my older brother spaszing on my mom, like right before Christmas and smashing a cookie.
0:08.0	Taking her Christmas cookies out of the oven and smashing them on his head.
0:31.0	Sometimes you wanna go where everybody knows your name.
0:38.0	And they're always glad you came.
0:43.0	You wanna be where you can see my troubles are all the same.
0:48.0	You wanna be where everybody knows your name.
0:53.0	You wanna go where we will know people are all the same.
0:57.0	You wanna go where everybody knows your name.
1:08.0	The greatest day in New York the whole year happened on Saturday everybody.
1:14.0	It was cleavage day.
1:17.0	I first heard about the legend of cleavage day from a man named Neil Brennan.
1:20.0	It was a long time resident of New York City.
1:22.0	He said, are you the first day of the year that it gets warm?
1:27.0	See a lot of girls showing off their bodies, letting the skin hang out.
1:33.0	I haven't been observing it for a couple years here.
1:36.0	We kind of missed one last year because there's no warm days until almost May.
1:40.0	You get a little bit okay and then it wouldn't really get gone.
1:43.0	Definitely didn't have it in a weekend.
1:46.0	And I theorized that to have a real cleavage day, you need that first warm day to fall on a weekend.
1:55.0	Or conversely, it can also happen if the nights warm as well.
2:02.0	And we got a perfect storm this Saturday everybody.
2:06.0	A perfect storm of cleavage.
	...

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