213: Why Gentle Parenting Is Unbiblical

Now That We're A Family

Elisha and Katie Voetberg

Kids & Family, Christianity, Religion & Spirituality

4.8 • 1.7K Ratings

🗓️ 13 June 2023

⏱️ 72 minutes

🔗️ Recording | iTunes | RSS

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Summary

Here we are once again tackling one of those topics that I think at one point we said we never wanted to talk about. We don’t want to talk about parenting from a “here’s how you do it" perspective because our oldest is six and if our children ever listen to this one day, they know that we were imperfect parents. We love them very much and we want to get better and better at this. That said, there are some things that are very, very wrong in our opinion about gentle parenting.

While we are called to be gentle in parenting as Christians, subscribing to the gentle parenting philosophy is not something that we should be pursuing. Biblical parenting is gentle, but gentle parenting is not biblical. The Bible says man is born into sin. As parents, it is our job to make our children aware of their sin and their need for a Savior. It is also our job to train them up in the nurture and admonition of Him.

These are God’s children. They are given to us to steward. When we are going to an expert and philosophy that is completely godless, it is not going to be neutral. We cannot expect it to be anti-god. Satan wants to take our kids. They are the next generation. He wants to take their hearts and eliminate the authority that God has placed in their lives as a protection, guidance and support to them. There is an agenda behind this and it’s not neutral.

Punishment is love and love is punishment when it is done in an appropriate and loving way. The most valuable gift a child can receive is a parent's love, time and support. Setting boundaries, having clear expectations and consequences, being able to share the Gospel with our children as often as we can, being as consistent as we can as parents in love and not in anger is so important. We need to go to God’s Word and His Scripture and continue to learn.

We pray that the Lord speaks to some of your through this and He continues to grow us as parents!

- Ephesians 6:1-3 - “Children, obey your parents in the Lord: for this is right. Honour thy father and mother; which is the first commandment with promise; That it may be well with thee, and thou mayest live long on the earth.”
- Proverbs 22:6 - “Train up a child in the way he should go: and when he is old, he will not depart from it.”
- Jeremiah 17:9-10 - “The heart is deceitful above all things, and desperately wicked: who can know it? I the Lord search the heart, I try the reins, even to give every man according to his ways, and according to the fruit of his doings.”
- Hebrews 12:11 - “Now no chastening for the present seemeth to be joyous, but grievous: nevertheless afterward it yieldeth the peaceable fruit of righteousness unto them which are exercised thereby.”
- Proverbs 22:15 - “Foolishness is bound in the heart of a child; but the rod of correction shall drive it far from him.”
- Proverbs 29:17 - “Correct thy son, and he shall give thee rest; yea, he shall give delight unto thy soul.”
- Proverbs 29:15 - “The rod and reproof give wisdom: but a child left to himself bringeth his mother to shame.”
- Proverbs 13:24 - “He that spareth his rod hateth his son: but he that loveth him chasteneth him betimes.”
- Proverbs 3:11-12 - “My son, despise not the chastening of the Lord; neither be weary of his correction: For whom the Lord loveth he correcteth; even as a father the son in whom he delighteth.”
- Leviticus 5:17 - “And if a soul sin, and commit any of these things which are forbidden to be done by the commandments of the Lord; though he wist it not, yet is he guilty, and shall bear his iniquity.”
- Job 5:17 - “Behold, happy is the man whom God correcteth: therefore despise not thou the chastening of the Almighty:

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Transcript

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0:00.0	Howdy folks. Welcome back to the podcast. We're back in the garage, which honestly, we don't mind it. Do we?
0:07.5	No, no, we don't at all. The only thing I mind is I think I'm losing my voice a little bit.
0:13.6	We've had a really long day to day. I feel like I've lived like three days today. And the last thing to do
0:21.2	is the podcast, which I'm so excited about, but I'm also so nervous about
0:27.2	because this is a really big topic. And we're talking about it after we would usually go to bed.
0:35.2	So anyways, hopefully the Lord is still able to use it. Of course, he's still able. But I mean, he's still
0:43.5	able to use it. I hope he does use it. In spite of us. In spite of us. Yeah, absolutely. All right, let's do this.
0:57.6	The now that we're a family. Yeah, here we are once again tackling one of those
1:03.5	topics that I think at one point we said we never wanted to talk about.
1:08.3	Yeah. Well, okay. So here's the deal. We don't want to talk about parenting from a,
1:13.6	here's how you do it perspective because our oldest is six. And
1:19.2	dear Leon Lucy Lewis Lawrence and baby in my tummy. If you guys are ever listening to this one day,
1:25.6	you know we were in perfect parents. And we love you very much. And we want to do our best to get
1:30.2	better and better at this. That said, there are some things that are very, very wrong in my opinion
1:42.3	about gentle parenting. And I think that we need to define terms here because I think a lot of
1:48.9	people would say they are gentle parents without realizing that that is advocating for something
1:56.4	that is completely unbiblical. And I know that sounds really strong, but the more I look into
2:05.5	this, the stronger I feel about it. And yeah, so anyways, it's something that we want to address
2:13.6	not specifically how to parent, but specifically why gentle parenting is an unbiblical model of
2:20.3	parenting. And while we are called to be gentle and parenting our children as Christians,
2:26.9	subscribing to the gentle parent philosophy is is not something that we should be pursuing.
2:35.7	All right. Well, let's define terms then because I mean, like I said before we started recording,
	...

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