It's Monday.

July.

It's Monday.

It's Monday. It's July 20th. And the word of the day is bibcock, which is a faucet with a bent

nozzle. It's also used colloquially as a verb, which means to drape an old t-shirt around your masturbation landing area

Can't catch so anytime my wife wears an old t-shirt. I'm no illusions

I'm Ethan Wright and broadcasting delayed from America's far center.

We are the Skeptocrats.

On episode 21, God'll forget to destroy America over gay marriage for yet another week.

Jade Helm 15 operatives won't hurt citizens into prison camps right away as a decoy.

Rapper 50-cent admits that his stage name grossly exaggerates his net worth.

And we learned that where Jared Fogle might be going,

he's going to need all that experience swallowing footlongs.

But first, the roundup. As part of a bailout from the European Union, looks like Greece will be forced to keep its banks closed, mortgage its collective assets, and sell

off its houses on Mediterranean for half price after landing on boardwalk with a hotel again.

The economy doesn't recover soon. Many Greek citizens in their 20s and 30s could be forced out of retirement.

Speaking of not having money, a rapper named after Greece's GDP 50 cent filed for Chapter 11 bankruptcy protection last week.

In response to a number of fans that were shocked by the news, Mr. Scent explained,

quote, why the fuck else would I have been in that Melissa McCarthy movie?

Think about it, end quote.

Moving over to sports news.

After investigating a 30 bicycle pile-up that temporarily halted the action at the Tour de France

...