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Your Mom's House with Christina P. and Tom Segura

196-Your Mom's House with Christina Pazsitzky and Tom Segura

Your Mom's House with Christina P. and Tom Segura

Tom Segura

Comedy, Relationships, Society & Culture, Tv & Film, Comedy Interviews

4.723.4K Ratings

🗓️ 12 February 2014

⏱️ 63 minutes

🧾️ Download transcript

Summary

I've been wanting to see what's in those Jeans for a long time! Oh, get your dirty mind out of my jeans. Cab drivers are hot and we all want a piece of them. Our favorite part about riding around with cabbies is their smell but also their cleanliness and also listening to their nice music and also when they ignore our requests. Yeah, that's about it. Shakey Jeans is gone, but who will replace him? Hopefully someone with a more debilitating condition. Is the NFL ready for a gay player? What if an entire team were gay and amazingly talented? We pray for this. Tom and Tina talk about their new business idea - which involves juice and dudes. We got Brown Talk, a NEW release from the King (A** Ripper), a wanna-be tough guy and MORE!

Transcript

Click on a timestamp to play from that location

0:00.0

We had a little bit of an argument going oh like who's the main the main

0:30.0

I think there's always going to break out in a tie no matter what you bring up

0:44.6

You can bring out this and you guys just gonna have to be the moms together. That's true

0:48.5

You know this is what you agreed upon anyways. See someone reasonable just came in the picture. Right. Whatever

0:54.8

Left to agree to mom agree. Yeah, which makes me

0:58.6

the main mommy. Yeah, wow. That was great. That was great. Felix Falcon made that. It's called

1:22.0

The full charge is the main mommy. That's full charges first song. Yeah, and this is a this is summer jeans right here. I like that. This is by Thomas Earl I believe and

1:34.6

I think you were saying earlier summer jeans would be nice in the winter time. Everybody's so cold right now. Everybody's so cold right now even us in California

1:43.5

It's dipped dangerously low into the upper 60s today. So this is for all you guys who aren't enjoying their summer jeans. Right. Some

1:52.6

of jeans are what shorter jeans they let that air breathe more in that denim. They cut you cut them off and then those

2:00.9

white strings they tickle your legs. When you're but hanged out of the bottom of those and they really hug your

2:06.6

crotch really nice. They're very comfortable. I think actually I used to have a pair of jeans like that when I was a kid. Uh-huh. They

2:15.6

really aren't that comfortable because they do not love that. They're terrible. Like you sit down and it goes right up your

2:21.6

coach and your butt. Yeah, well no complaints here. Right up there. Let's see those camel toes ladies.

2:28.3

Um jeans we got quite a month coming up. This week we go to the windy city to do to do uh shows at the Chicago improv in

2:44.3

Schomburg. Chicago. Chicago. So please come see us Thursday through Sunday at the Chicago improv. We'll be together. We don't do it a lot but we're

2:54.3

there special special occasion is Valentine's Day. So we're doing it for you. It's all the love you can handle to Mommy's one jeans. One Valentine's. Um and then it gets real exciting. You go somewhere next

3:12.3

to you to Orlando. I go to mom land. Okay. That's February 20th through 23rd. Uh-huh. And then I go to the San Jose improv. Now guys my shows are only now Friday and Saturday. They

3:26.3

change the schedule. I'm only doing four shows Friday and Saturday. Please come to Saturday. Please show out because I'm you know videoing videoing that for a special. So I really need you guys. I'll tell you this too. As I had to take the same thing before I

3:41.3

was going to put my mind guys go out support her. Bring uh bring friends laugh and have a good time just be there and and don't be a disruption. I'm I'm asking you for my jeans. Yeah. Be good. Be good.

3:57.3

Remember and she just needs people you know in those seats there there to have a good time. So go see her when you when you're mom is in the fucking stands. You know what I'm saying. Definitely need moms in the fucking stands for that. Um it goes on. I I actually will go to Raleigh. I'm doing Charlie Goodnights February 27th through March 1st. And then the live podcasts really take off in March. We are going to do a live podcast in Brooklyn at the Bell House on March 30th.

4:26.3

On March 13th. Please get your tickets. You can get those tickets on my site. Tom Segura dot com. There's also links up on the podcast. Yeah your mom's house podcast dot com. Excellent.

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