You are listening to You Are Not Broken, the only podcast that combines science, medicine, and psychology to re-educate your brain and help you live your best love life. And I'm your host, board-certified female urologist, Dr. Kelly Casperson. For people who don't know me, I'm Dr. Kelly Casperson. I'm a board-certified urologist practicing up in Washington, Bellingham.

So I always say I'm north of Seattle or south of Canada, because I'm pretty close up there.

So this is a jam-packed hour because Dr. Lee said you guys can drink through fire hoses,

and I literally can't talk about one part of sex without people understanding how complex sex is.

Sex is very complex, which is why I fell in love with the topic.

So rules of engagement when talking about sex, judgment-free zone, there might be things that come up that you resist

because we've been socialized to think a certain way about sex and how it should be.

And just pay attention to those thoughts

as they come up. They're useful in trying to like process new information. I hope I tell you stuff

that'll blow your mind because I dove deep into this in trying to help my patients. And I've been

on about a three to four year journey. I never learned any of this in residency. And for any

urologist to even take a slight interest,

so they'd help the people that come into their office would bring me great joy.

So bladder cancer got me here.

I had a patient that back when I did cystectomies in my early private practice world,

took out a lady's bladder, and I see her once a year.

About year five, she came in, bawling in my office, saying, I have a lady's bladder and I see her once a year, about year five, she came in

bawling in my office saying, I have a great marriage, I don't want sex at all, it makes me sad,

my husband's sad, we're just all sad, and I don't know what to do about it. And I had a box of

Kleenex in my office and it literally like lightning struck me of like, I have a box of Kleenex. I have nothing

else to help her. And is it true that we don't know how to help women with their sexual dysfunction?

So she's literally, and I've told her now because she's come back, literally told her that she's

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