182 SelfWork: Filler or Fulfillment? Five Ways to Figure It Out
The SelfWork Podcast
Margaret Robinson Rutherford PhD
4.8 • 1.3K Ratings
🗓️ 29 May 2020
⏱️ 28 minutes
🧾️ Download transcript
Summary
Today we’re going to talk about staying busy – not the welcome kind of busyness where you’re actually doing things you love that bring you fulfillment, but the kind of busyness that basically serves as filler in your life. You couldn’t tell me why you’re doing it, or how you got started – other than to say that you’re scared to stop – because you fear a loss of control. I'll offer five tangible ways you can face your fears of change and figure out if too much of your life is spent filling time rather than risking true fulfillment.
So today, in an episode sponsored by BetterHelp, I’m talking about busyness that’s all about staying in control. It’s definitely tied into the entire presentation of perfectly hidden depression (PHD) – and so this belongs in the episodes about PHD already featured here. If you’ve not listened to them, the first two are extremely early – Episodes 003 and 004and the rest are interspersed throughout.
Our listener email for today is from someone who heavily identifies with PHD but also is struggling with a highly dangerous eating disorder – so you can hear my advice to her.
Important Links:
BetterHelp, the #1 online therapy provider, has a special offer for you now!.
You can hear more about this and many other topics by listening to my podcast, SelfWork with Dr. Margaret Rutherford. Subscribe to my website and receive my weekly newsletter including a blog post and podcast! If you’d like to join my FaceBook closed group, then click here and answer the membership questions! Welcome!
My new book entitled Perfectly Hidden Depression has arrived and you can order here! Its message is specifically for those with a struggle with strong perfectionism which acts to mask underlying emotional pain. But the many self-help techniques described can be used by everyone who chooses to begin to address emotions long hidden away that are clouding and sabotaging your current life. And it's available in paperback, eBook or as an audiobook!
And there’s a new way to send me a message! You can record by clicking below and ask your question or make a comment. You’ll have 90 seconds to do so and that time goes quickly. By recording, you’re giving SelfWork (and me) permission to use your voice on the podcast. I’ll look forward to hearing from you!
Our Sponsors: * Check out BetterHelp and use my code betterhelp.com for a great deal: https://www.betterhelp.com Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brands
Transcript
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| 0:00.0 | This is self-work and I'm Dr. Margaret Rutherford. |
| 0:13.0 | At self-work we'll discuss psychological and emotional issues common in today's world and what to do about them. |
| 0:20.0 | I'm Dr. Margaret and self-work is a podcast dedicated to you taking just a few minutes today for your own self-work. |
| 0:29.0 | Hello and welcome or welcome back to self-work. I'm Dr. Margaret Rutherford. I'm a clinical |
| 0:34.6 | psychologist and I've been working and living in Fayetteville, Arkansas since 1993. |
| 0:39.5 | I began this podcast in 2016 in order to reach really three groups. |
| 0:44.7 | Those of you who are quite comfortable with emotional and psychological issues, |
| 0:48.4 | maybe you're already in therapy and you're wanting to learn more from perhaps another |
| 0:52.4 | perspective to those of you who've just |
| 0:54.6 | been diagnosed with depression or anxiety or an eating disorder or a PTSD or whatever you could |
| 1:00.6 | be struggling with, maybe a relationship issue that you just find puzzling. |
| 1:05.0 | So you're looking for answers. |
| 1:07.0 | But then there's a third group. |
| 1:08.0 | Those of you who might never darken the door of a therapist or certainly don't think you would but are curious enough or |
| 1:14.4 | perhaps anxious enough to look for some answers yourself. |
| 1:18.0 | Welcome to all three of you or as one listener told me one time those of you who can't afford therapy. |
| 1:25.0 | Now this isn't therapy, this is a therapeutic podcast, but I still hope it's helpful to you. |
| 1:31.0 | Today we're going to talk about staying busy, not the welcome kind of |
| 1:34.8 | busyness where you're actually doing things you love that bring you fulfillment, |
| 1:37.9 | but the kind of busyness that basically serves as filler in your life. You couldn't tell me why you're doing it or how you got |
| 1:44.5 | started other than to say that you're kind of scared to stop because you fear a loss of |
| 1:49.7 | control. You're nervous about leaving any space in your day where you become quiet. |
... |
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