166 SelfWork (Second Time Around): Four Ways to Find Your Way Back to Love
The SelfWork Podcast
Margaret Robinson Rutherford PhD
4.8 • 1.3K Ratings
🗓️ 4 January 2022
⏱️ 29 minutes
🧾️ Download transcript
Summary
Starting off in a new year, knowing it'll be filled with both challenge and celebration, it helps to think you have a solid partnership in your life. But if you have conflict or estrangement or alienation within your relationship, facing a new year can be more than daunting and certainly very lonely. Today we’re going to focus on what can cause these kinds of problems. But as usual, we’re also focusing on “what you can do about it.” I’ll use a couples therapy case from my own practice that shows that even though a problem may seem insurmountable, and like the relationship is over, there are four attitudes and actions that can help you find your way back to each other – and even to love.
Our listener email today is a very poignant one from a young man whose relationship with his mom was rocky due to her being abusive. But now she’s died of a second bout with cancer. And he finds himself pushing away others who love him, except for his two year-old child. He wants to understand his actions, and I’ll do my best to answer his question.
But before going further, let's hear from a great SelfWork sponsor - Athletic Greens who has a great offer for you - as well as bonus product! (I use this every day and it's great!)
Important Links:
Here's the link once again to my new interactive podcast on Fireside Chat! Click here!
Click Here for the fabulous offer from Athletic Greens - now AG1 - with bonus product with your subscription!
Podcast on handling narcissism in relationships
Podcast on loving someone with borderlinepersonality disorder
You can hear more relationship advice and many other topics by listening to my podcast, SelfWork with Dr. Margaret Rutherford. Subscribe to my website and receive one weekly newsletter including my weekly blog post and podcast! If you’d like to join my FaceBook closed group, then clickhere and answer the membership questions! Welcome!
My new book entitled Perfectly Hidden Depression has arrived and you can order here! Its message is specifically for those with a struggle with strong perfectionism which acts to mask underlying emotional pain. But the many self-help techniques described can be used by everyone who chooses to begin to address emotions long hidden away that are clouding and sabotaging your current life.
And there’s a new way to send me a message! You can record by clicking below and ask your question or make a comment. You’ll have 90 seconds to do so and that time goes quickly. By recording, you’re giving SelfWork (and me) permission to use your voice on the podcast. I’ll look forward to hearing from you!
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| 0:00.0 | This is Selfwork, and I'm Dr. Margaret Rutherford. |
| 0:14.1 | At Selfwork, we'll discuss psychological and emotional issues common in today's world |
| 0:19.0 | and what to do about them. |
| 0:20.4 | I'm Dr. Margaret, and Selfwork is a podcast dedicated to you taking just a few minutes today |
| 0:26.2 | for your own Selfwork. |
| 0:29.8 | Hello, and welcome to Selfwork. |
| 0:31.8 | I'm Dr. Margaret Rutherford. |
| 0:33.1 | I'm a clinical psychologist. |
| 0:34.8 | I've lived and worked in fave Arkansas for almost 30 years, and I started Selfwork five |
| 0:40.7 | years ago in order to extend the walls of my practice to those of you who might already |
| 0:45.3 | be very interested in psychological emotional issues. |
| 0:48.6 | Maybe you're in therapy as well, but we enjoy another perspective. |
| 0:52.0 | To the group of you who might just been diagnosed with something and you're looking for answers |
| 0:56.1 | or you're having a relationship issue that you just can't seem to settle or find a |
| 1:01.5 | way through, but also to a third group of you, to those of you who might sit around |
| 1:06.6 | until your friends are that therapy stuff that's for the birds, I'd never do it, but you're |
| 1:11.8 | curious enough or sadly unhappy enough to want to listen to Selfwork. |
| 1:17.2 | So welcome to all of you. |
| 1:20.4 | Starting off in this new year, knowing it'll be filled with both challenges and celebration, |
| 1:25.5 | it helps to think you have a solid partnership in your life. |
| 1:29.4 | But if you have conflict or strangement or alienation within your relationship, facing |
| 1:34.6 | a new year can be more than daunting and certainly very lonely. |
... |
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