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Hello Dysfunction

164: Gas Station Pedophile

Hello Dysfunction

Hello Dysfunction

Comedy, Improv

51.8K Ratings

🗓️ 18 March 2022

⏱️ 84 minutes

🧾️ Download transcript

Summary

RIP to our dear listener Lauren.
Do your laundry.
Carolyn needs to make some money.
Divorce is ok!!
Swear on your own life.
It pays to be a good person and tiny mustaches should be a thing.

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Instagram.com/lurkpatafria
Instagram.com/crystaldamato21

Email us your questions/stories at: [email protected]

Transcript

Click on a timestamp to play from that location

0:00.0

Hey guys! Welcome to Hello to Function Episode 164!

0:20.0

Already starting off with a shitload of... defunction!

0:24.0

This is trying to shimmy into her chair behind the microphone without knocking everything over.

0:31.0

Right before we started I was like, I'm gonna do this episode without a lot of mic interference.

0:36.0

I'm not gonna touch my equipment. So I get it all ready before I fucking, you know, hit record.

0:42.0

And as soon as I go to sit down... I knock it all over.

0:47.0

She gets the most noise she's ever made as soon as she said that.

0:51.0

So this is take two. Yes. Welcome. I'm Pada Frea. I'm Crystal.

0:58.0

Can we start out this episode first and foremost by saying rest in peace?

1:06.0

Yeah, we lost a member of our Hello Disfunction family.

1:10.0

I'm so bummed. A lot of you guys know her on Instagram as a lore underscore in.

1:18.0

Her name was Lauren. She was a mom, a wife.

1:24.0

She's followed me for a hell of fucking years. She just is someone that would interact every time.

1:30.0

You know how some people will like everything you post on your story or just at some point during every day she would hit me about something.

1:38.0

Yeah, she's someone that we interacted with very frequently.

1:42.0

Like remember details of like old jokes. Like, you know, was really somebody like active in our family, our HD family.

1:52.0

Yeah, and the way we found out is so fucked up. I opened, you know, I've talked about the death after dark Facebook group before.

2:02.0

You know, quite a few of you guys have joined it and I opened my Facebook this morning and the very first post on my feed is from that group and it's of her and my heart just drops.

2:16.0

Like what are the odds? That is so fucking sad. So sad. She sent me a screenshot. Like, you're not going to believe what I saw when I fucking opened my phone or whatever today.

2:28.0

And she sent me the picture and then she sent me like a screenshot of her page. And I just like gasped. I was like, oh my fucking god, like I just talked to her.

2:38.0

It's, you know, you feel like you get used to people that you talk to on the fucking internet, you know. And so it's like when you when something like that happens, you actually be fucking sad. Even if you haven't met before, you know, like in person, it's still someone that.

2:54.0

You interact with more impact, yeah, makes an impact. I interact interacted with her more than I did, like family or like, you know, friends in real life. So yeah, very fucking sad.

...

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