163 - Gift Guide for the Friend Who’s Doing Too Much

Camp Counselors with Zachariah Porter and Jonathan Carson

PodcastOne

Talk Radio, Comedy

5 • 2.8K Ratings

🗓️ 10 December 2025

⏱️ 64 minutes

🔗️ Recording | iTunes | RSS

🧾️ Download transcript

Summary

This week at Camp Shady Birch, we’re unwrapping the worst part of the holidays: truly unhinged gift guides and the chaos of simply being alive in December! Counselor Zachariah kicks things off with a parking violation saga for the ages after he found a bright orange sticker slapped on his perfectly legal parked car and immediately took to the internet to publicly drag the culprit. Festive! Counselor Jonathan dives into the wild story of a magician who implanted an RFID chip in his hand for magic tricks and then forgot the password to his own hand. It's giving tech anxiety. Also, a new study about how urban raccoons are literally evolving shorter snouts and showing early signs of domestication just from living in our cities and eating our garbage. We love new housemates!! They should pay rent lol! We've got the annual curse of dry cracked knuckles, terrible holiday gift guides, undying love for gingerbread men and why they’ve finally (rightfully!!) become the face of the holiday season this year, and so much more!

This episode was mixed and edited by Kevin Betts.

Get your tickets to see Zachariah Porter's new Live Comedy Tour!

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Works Cited:

➜ Pring, Joe. “Magician ‘Forgot the Password’ to His Own Hand after Locking Himself Out of Implanted RFID Chip.” Dexerto, 22 Nov. 2025.

➜ Hill, Marta. “Urban Raccoons Are Showing Signs of Early Domestication, With Shorter Snouts Than Their Rural Cousins.” Smithsonian Magazine, 21 Nov. 2025.

Camp Songs:

Spotify Playlist | YouTube Playlist | Sammich's Secret Mixtape

Social Media:

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Transcript

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0:00.0	The weight is over. Dive into Audubles' most anticipated collection, the best of 2025, featuring top audiobooks, podcasts, and originals across all genres. Our editors have carefully curated this year's must-listens, from brilliant hidden gems to the busiest new releases.
0:23.7	Every title in this collection has earned its spot.
0:28.3	This is your go-to for the absolute best in 2025 audio entertainment.
0:31.6	Whether you love thrillers, romance, or non-fiction,
0:33.6	your next favorite listen awaits.
0:38.8	Discover why there's more to imagine when you listen at audible.com slash best of the year.
0:42.8	Have you ever canoed down a babbling brook?
0:45.2	No, but I have cried at a Taco Bell.
0:46.9	Oh, same thing.
0:48.4	Listen up, campers.
0:51.2	It's time to buckle up, pitch a tent, and take a hike.
0:53.2	Because Camp Counselors is a variety show.
0:55.6	So prepare for a good old-fashioned kumbaya.
0:56.5	Weird news.
0:57.3	Hot gossip.
0:59.8	And scary stories around the campfire.
1:01.1	So spooky.
1:03.0	Is this podcast even about camping?
1:04.3	No, but it is camp.
1:07.7	This is Camp Counselors.
1:12.3	Hey, happy campers.
1:14.8	Welcome back to Camp Shady Birch.
	...

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