Welcome back to the savvy psychologist. I'm Dr. Ellen Hendrickson and every week I'll help

you meet life's challenges with evidence-based research, a sympathetic ear, and zero judgment.

Admit it, you've sung along, so you know that when the player's going to play and

the hater's going to hate, you're just supposed to shake, shake,

it off.

But have you ever really tried to do that?

It's really, really hard.

Whoever made up the old playground added of sticks and stones may break my bones,

but words will never hurt me was clearly never a target of family gossip,

judgey friends, or internet trolls. Now, there is a big difference between constructive

criticism and the judgment of haters. Constructive criticism, although negative, by definition, contains ways to help you improve and grow.

At its heart, constructive criticism aims to help you and is on your side. So if you're so lucky as to receive

constructive criticism, learn all you can from it. But haters are another story.

True hate is unconstructive. There's nothing in there for you.

Instead, all the benefits go to the hater. Their intention is to hurt and provoke you,

usually as a way to feel powerful or in control, or to put on a show to earn the admiration of others at your expense.

Now, some of us react to haters by getting mad,

while others react by feeling hurt. Either way, it's rough.

Even when you've been showered with love and support,

one hater can feel like a bucket of ice water

thrown squarely in your face.

Okay, so this week by request from listener Melody, who asked what to do when she finds herself invalidated, unsupported, or otherwise hated on, here are six tips to deal in the moment, move

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