I am hopping mad and I want something in the middle. Aha! Y'absolutely, y'y, absolutely. Monkey tennis? Bring, bring. There's a new chat in town. I had the last laugh. Don't! Monkey tennis? Little pierced my foot on a spike. With a chuckle, with a chuckle. Oh. Monkey tennis? Radical, awesome. Mega. B-Bongy tennis? tennis okay where's my assistant i do not know monkey tennis

edmunds is a total wazook of a guy yes yes yes yes and yes it's hotter than the sun they said

oh the hell is that look and this is great answer yeah monkey tennis of the net. The people who enjoy Alan Partridge will enjoy this podcast. The people who've never got it still won't get it. Hello, friends, and welcome to Monkey Tennis, the Alan Partridge fan podcast, where we're steamrolling our way through Alan's third mighty book, Big Beacon. I'm Adam Brooks, and I'm joined by Tom Dark.

The deathbed promise I'd made to Peter Flint, which, as I say, definitely happened.

Nick Alder, I began to withdrawing to myself like an animal's penis when not in use.

And Tom Stab.

They tended to be a roughly equal split between kind letters from elderly women, autograph requests and death threats.

So yes, you join us as we're roughly around the halfway mark of Big Beacon.

We've had a little laughs.

We've had some sad times as well.

And as of this episode, Nick has passed the baton to Mr. Tom Stab, who's going to be taking us into the

second half of the book with a chapter called Bullhorn Boss. Take it away, Tom. I'm quite surprised

that no one has done any big lighthouse facts, but have I got some big lighthouse facts

for you, ladies and gentlemen? Thank God. Did you know that as of 2025, the United Kingdom maintains an extensive network of

active lighthouses with over 300 operational lights guiding maritime traffic around its coasts,

and over 60 lighthouses around the UK are still actively used for navigation.

While all UK lighthouses have been automated since the 90s,

eliminating the need for traditional lighthouse keepers,

they continue to function effectively,

ensuring the safety of vessels navigating British waters.

They act as a backup to modern navigation.

While GPS and electronic navigation dominate,

...