Hello and

every week I'll help you meet life's

Dr. Ellen Hendrickson and every week I'll help you meet life's challenges

with evidence-based research, a sympathetic ear, and zero judgment.

While calling something perfect is the highest of compliments, a perfectly done steak, a perfect Olympic performance, the perfect prom dress, calling someone a perfectionist is anything but.

Why? Well, it implies a fussy control freak who can't relax.

Perfectionists have a reputation of being hard-driving, uncompromising, relentless, and often it turns out very successful.

Steve Jobs was a notorious perfectionist.

Martha Stewart calls herself a maniacal perfectionist.

Serena Williams proudly wears the perfectionist label.

All three of these people, and likely some of the perfectionists you know, maybe even you, have risen to the heights of their

field, made themselves rich and famous, and have delivered great work, but not without cost.

And it's these costs, anger, stress, abrasiveness,

being seen as picky, rigid, or over-controlling

that makes most people shun the perfectionist label.

As a result, perfectionists almost never claim to be perfectionists.

And further, because the label is a misnomer, most perfectionists don't even realize their perfectionists.

Okay, so how is it a misnomer?

Well, contrary to the name, most perfectionists aren't driven by the pursuit of perfection.

They're driven by the pursuit of perfection. They're driven by the avoidance of failure.

Being a perfectionist isn't about being perfect,

it's about never being good enough.

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