Mormon Stories Podcast takes a ton of work and depends solely upon the listener's support.

To keep this program alive, please consider a donation today at MormonStories.org.

Let me turn to probably the biggest issue that we haven't tackled.

It's very common for the children to become footballs in the oppositional game that happens when there's a believer in a disbeliever.

From the disbeliever's perspective, it's like I'm not going to subject my children to that guilt.

I'm not going to subject my children to the lies and the deception.

I'm not going to subject them to patriarchy.

I'm not going to subject my girls to the way that the girls are devalued.

I don't want my son serving a mission.

Husband or believer, you go do what you want, but I'm not going to stand for my kids to be for the lie to be perpetrated through them.

That's the disbeliever's perspective.

The believer's perspective is, look, you want to go screw up your life.

Our kids are going to be faithful. They're going to go to seminary.

They're going to go on missions. They're going to get married at the temple.

This is good for them. This is wholesome for them.

This is going to make them happy and go mess up your own life.

But I'm bringing the kids with me and there's no negotiation about that.

Did you guys ever then or do you ever now sympathize with either those poles?

And how do you keep the kids from becoming footballs in a very violent context sport, so to speak?

You know, it can happen really easily and I sympathize with both of those poles.

Both of them, I can see it from both sides.

I don't want to be outside of my own child's temple wedding like a kid, you know.

...