#151: A Very Destructive Selfie

The Shallow End

John Elliott and Lindsay Schnebly

Society & Culture, Comedy, History

4.9 • 612 Ratings

🗓️ 16 April 2025

⏱️ 36 minutes

🔗️ Recording | iTunes | RSS

🧾️ Download transcript

Summary

In Episode #151, Jethro starts with a story of a woman looking for “The Perfect Selfie” at a swanky Los Angeles art exhibit featuring 12 very large and expensive pieces of…well…art. What could go wrong, we ask? Just a slight adjustment to line up the perfect selfie. Lean back just a few inches, and…well…something went very, very wrong. Then, Lindsay tells us a story proving that politicians with inflated egos and stupid decisions are nothing new. This story goes back to 1917 from a German Foreign Minister who devised the perfect plan to keep America out of World War I. And we all know how well that idea worked! Take those selfies and fire up the bratwurst! Episode #151 is a barn-burner! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Transcript

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0:00.0	It began long ago, two young boys in an American town riding their bikes to school and little league practice.
0:09.0	Over the years, the boys became fast friends, united in their love for stories where things would go horribly wrong.
0:18.0	Pour yourself a strong beverage and buckle up. You're in the shallow end with
0:23.5	Schnebley and Toff. When I was a kid, J.G., in kindergarten, I had a ritual that my mom would pick
0:30.6	me up from kindergarten, and I would come home and sit at the breakfast bar, the little breakfast
0:34.9	nook, and she would talk to me while I ate the same
0:38.3	lunch every single weekday, which was a peanut butter and honey sandwich. Ooh, I love peanut
0:44.5	butter and honey. With a little glass of milk. And guess what I had this morning for breakfast
0:49.0	after my hike? Oh, that's so cute. I was just back in kindergarten and thinking about my mom and thinking how blessed I was to have a mom who made me the same effing sandwich every day of my kindergarten career.
1:02.8	Aren't those wonderful memories?
1:04.4	They really are, yeah.
1:05.6	I remember my mom picking me up from nursery school, like the half day you know right right and
1:13.3	bringing me home in this station wagon she'd let me like roll around in the back before it was
1:18.1	illegal you know right right and we would get home and go into the house and I would say mom
1:24.9	I'm hungry can you make me some lunch and and she would say make it your, Mom, I'm hungry. Can you make me some lunch?
1:28.0	And she would say, make it your own damn self.
1:31.5	I'm not your slave.
1:32.9	Right.
1:33.5	There you go.
1:34.6	Never forget, dear old mom.
1:36.3	I love those memories.
1:38.4	We had a cream-colored, I think it was a 1965 Ford Country Squire station wagon.
	...

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