147: Girls Are Harassing My Son. What Should I Do?

Ask Lisa: The Psychology of Parenting

Dr. Lisa Damour/Good Trouble Productions

Kids & Family, Mental Health, Parenting, Health & Fitness

4.8 • 720 Ratings

🗓️ 5 December 2023

⏱️ 32 minutes

🔗️ Recording | iTunes | RSS

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Summary

Getting a lot of attention from girls might not seem like a problem. But a mother writes in asking Dr. Lisa for advice on how to deal with the fact that girls are fawning over her son who wants no part of it. He feels embarrassed by the attention and finds that ignoring it only seems to be making the situation worse. The boy’s father worries that his son might develop a reputation for being the “mean kid” for not acknowledging or responding to the girls’ incessant overtures. Dr. Lisa and Reena discuss what the boy should do, consider how to define and handle harassment, and address whether the situation would be different if the gender roles were reversed. The episode highlights several conversations that all parents should be having with their teens sooner rather than later. Follow and subscribe to our YouTube channel where you can see all our latest video episodes: https://youtube.com/@asklisapodcast And follow us on YouTube, Instagram, Facebook, Twitter, and LinkedIn @AskLisaPodcast, @Lisa.Damour, @ReenaNinan. Checkout Dr. Lisa’s website for more resources: https://www.drlisadamour.com/ Ask Lisa is produced by: https://www.goodtroubleproductions.com

Transcript

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0:00.0	Hi, I'm Rina Ninean and this is Ask Lisa, the Psychology of Parenting Podcast.
0:10.7	It's a podcast to help parents better understand their kids. Dr. Lisa DeMore, a psychologist with three
0:17.2	decades of experience, and the author of three New York Times best-selling parenting
0:21.8	books takes your questions. Both of us are moms ourselves, and we're eager to hear from you.
0:27.1	So send us your questions to Ask Lisa at Dr.LisaDemore.com. And you can join our community by
0:32.8	following us on Instagram, Facebook, Twitter, and LinkedIn. The handle is Ask Lisa Podcast.
0:38.5	And also subscribe to our brand new YouTube channel, Ask Lisa Podcast.
0:43.1	Episode 147, girls are harassing my son.
0:46.3	What should I do?
0:51.6	You know, we always get these interesting letters, so many of them, topics that I never would think would be important in parenting.
0:58.8	And I kind of laughed at first when I saw this because it sounds a little silly, but then I realized it's kind of important.
1:07.5	Yeah, this is a really important topic.
1:11.1	I mean, do you see this a lot?
1:12.5	It's about a parent writing in about son being harassed by all these girls who find him attractive, but the son doesn't want the attention.
1:19.7	Is this something you've seen in your practice?
1:21.6	It is.
1:22.5	It is.
1:23.0	And I actually think I would categorize it under sort of not discussed nearly enough.
1:28.0	Oh.
1:28.3	That there is definitely a moment in middle school, and I think this is a middle school letter,
1:35.6	where the girls are very forward in their advances, and the boys can feel overwhelmed.
1:42.8	And this is just one slice of the romantic landscape, but it's one
	...

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