You're listening to On Attachment, a place to learn about how attachment shapes the way we experience

relationships and where you'll gain the guidance, knowledge and practical tools to overcome

insecurity and build healthy, thriving relationships.

I'm your host, relationship coach Stephanie Rigg,

and I'm really glad you're here.

Hey everybody, welcome back to another episode of On Attachment. In today's episode, I'm going to be

talking about togetherness and separateness in anxious

avoidant relationships and how to navigate the tension between those conflicting needs

that you might have as an anxious avoiding couple.

Now, full disclosure up front, I don't know that what I've titled this episode actually

accurately captures what I'm going to be talking

about, which is a struggle that I often have, the titles that are catchy, often lack nuance.

And then if I try and add more nuance to the title, then it sounds a little bit dense and

wordy for a quick one-liner. So what I'm really going to be talking about today is less about

how to navigate the actual time spent apart versus together and more sharing a tip, which I think

is not obvious, but is incredibly effective and transformative to soften some of the friction

that can arise when it comes to separating for anxious

people and coming back together for avoidant people. Because if you've noticed, for anxious

folks, it is that shift from being together to a part that can be quite distressing. And for

avoidant folks, it is the shift from being in their

aloneness, in their own time and space, to coming back together, which can be the friction point for

them. And oftentimes there can be misunderstandings, miscommunications, and, you know, those attachment

...