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Hi, everyone. I'm Peter. I'm an alcoholic.

Step five. One of my most careful steps. I admitted to God, to myself, and to another human being the exact nature of my wrongs.

First off, I'm an alcoholic.

I think that the thing about the fourth step of what Daniel is talking about, that I come into AA, I'm a character, I'm full of fears.

And as Randy so wonderfully points out, every time I see him, I'm in a state of complete defeat.

I'm not really willing to accept that defeat.

But by going through the fourth step, as Daniel was talking about, of making a list, of taking an inventory, of finding out who I really am, it enables me to be able to have a worthwhile relationship with other human beings and with God.

That's something I didn't have when I came into AA. Because I was a performer. I was a people

pleaser. And I did that in my mind by working very hard. But actually what that hard work was all

about, working at the studios in my case, you know, working 12-hour days and seven-day weeks and all this kind of stuff.

And I tried to get the approval by doing that type of work.

But what I was actually doing is I was very busy.

And, you know, I stayed very busy in my own head, so I didn't have to address the facts as to why I wasn't getting the approval

that I sought. So, you know, I was reading out of the 12 by 12 this morning, and there was an

interesting to me paragraph at the bottom of 57. I'll just read it. It's just a few lines. It says when I reached

AA and for the first time in my life stood amongst people who seemed to understand the sense

of belonging was tremendously exciting. I thought the isolation problem had been solved.

But I soon discovered that while I wasn't alone anymore in a social sense,

I still suffered many of the old pangs of anxious apartness. Until I had talked with complete

...