107 - Friday Fix: Is Looking on the Bright Side Good for Your Mental Health?

The Verywell Mind Podcast

Dotdash Media Inc.

Health & Fitness, Self-improvement, Mental Health, Education

5 • 703 Ratings

🗓️ 24 September 2021

⏱️ 11 minutes

🔗️ Recording | iTunes | RSS

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Summary

There are many undisputed benefits of being a positive, optimistic person. And if you aren’t naturally a positive person, you can learn to become one. Part of being a positive person might involve looking for the silver lining even in hardship. Perhaps you can even recognize times in your life when you were able to see how something good came out of something really bad. Like maybe a breakup allowed you to meet someone better. Or maybe a job loss helped you discover inner strength that you never even knew existed. You’ve likely also encountered people who encourage you to look on the bright side. Maybe your mom reminds you that, “Something better will come along,” when you don’t get hired. Or maybe your friend says, “Well, at least he’s in a better place,” when your dog dies. Should you listen to these attempts to remind you about the silver lining? Should you go looking for a silver lining when the benefits aren’t obvious? These are some of the questions I address on today’s Friday Fix. I reveal what the research says about looking on the bright side and how doing so might affect your mental health and your physical health. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Transcript

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0:00.0	Welcome to the Very Well Mind podcast. We've interviewed over 100 authors, experts, entrepreneurs, athletes, musicians, and others to help you learn strategies to care for your mental health.
0:22.9	This episode is hosted by psychotherapist and bestselling author Amy Morin. Now let's get into the episode.
0:50.7	Okay. Every Friday, I share a quick mental strength strategy that will help fix the thoughts, feelings, and actions that can hold you back in life.
0:54.9	Today I'm talking about how and when to look for the silver lining in life.
0:59.3	If you go through a hard time, should you pause and think for a minute about all the good things that could come out of it? Well, looking on the bright side might help you get through a
1:03.9	tough situation. But before we dive into talking about how to do that, let's talk about the fact
1:09.9	that there are some risks to always
1:11.5	looking on the bright side. Toxic positivity is something that we've discussed on the show before,
1:17.0	and it can be bad for your mental health. First, let me explain more about what it means to look for
1:22.4	the silver lining. It's a technique that we use in therapy sometimes, but we do so with caution.
1:28.9	Someone who went through a painful divorce a few years back might recognize that although
1:33.6	it was a really tough time, they also might see how the end of the relationship help them grow
1:38.8	stronger.
1:40.0	A situation like that is an example of how looking for the silver lining might be helpful.
1:44.8	But that can turn into toxic positivity when it causes someone to ignore their pain.
1:49.6	Here's an example. A woman came into my therapy office once telling me about how she'd
1:53.8	discovered her husband of five years had been cheating on her. She'd already come to the conclusion
1:59.6	that she was going to file for divorce. And her response
2:02.8	to the situation was, well, at least we don't have kids. She tried to kind of brush it off as if she
2:08.7	didn't care that it wasn't all that painful. And maybe it was true that she was grateful that in this
2:14.0	situation, they didn't have kids who were going to go through the divorce too,
2:22.2	but it seemed like she was just using it as a buffer to try and convince herself that somehow their breakup was a happy thing. Looking on the bright side turns into toxic positivity when it
	...

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