Come on, if you're Asian and you need someone to speak on behalf of you, I'm a pretty good choice, aren't I?

I'm proud of our culture, I like our food, and bitch about white people who fuck up our food, that is like 90% of what an Asian representative spokesperson should do.

Welcome to the Haia podcast, a comedy podcast about disappointment.

This is episode one, baby, the first episode.

Thank you for tuning in.

How are you guys doing?

How are you guys?

Getting through, getting by, holidays almost, holiday seasons upon us.

Have you got on your Christmas presents?

Have you received any Christmas presents?

I'm friends with a lot of international people here in London, so everybody's flying everywhere.

And I try my best to get presents for them before they fly back to the home country or wherever they're going.

And it's crazy.

And then there's this new variant that's scaring everyone.

Yeah, like, let's, I don't know like to talk about COVID.

It's a bit boring now, isn't it?

Oh, there's no new variant.

Every time you hear like COVID news stories, it's never, it's never fun news.

It's never, uh, COVID's gone, bye. You know, it's a new variant. More deaths.

Hospitals understaffed. COVID has had the reverse effect on my travel plans. You know,

because before COVID days, you would think, yeah, I want to go on holiday sometimes. Maybe I'll go to Greece, you know, but then you just keep putting it off.

Because you're like, yeah, Greece will always be there.

...