09: Getting Over Loss
Life Coaching with Christine Hassler
Christine Hassler
4.8 • 1.7K Ratings
🗓️ 11 November 2015
⏱️ 33 minutes
🧾️ Download transcript
Summary
This episode will support you in getting through and to the other side of any kind of loss. My coaching call with Regina today uncovers the challenges she is having with grief over the loss of her husband. She says she regrets not being the best mother in the world and not living the life she wanted to live. She's is questioning her purpose and experiencing quite a bit of apathy in her life.
Regina experiences an "aha" when she realizes she is able to create the positive future she desires.
Take note of Regina's tone of voice before my coaching as she describes beating herself up and then again after we discuss her ability to practice self-love.
Regina shared her progress with me in an email after our session. She writes "I've started forgiving myself and when I find myself in a negative thought I stop and think "this isn't self-love".
It's a reminder to all of us to live, not just exist. Find something you want to live for, even it seems silly and give yourself permission to love.
Consider/Ask Yourself:
Have you recently been through a loss and can't seem to move on?
Have you been through a loss and are aware you need time to grieve?
Do you tend to look back on your life and wish you could have done things differently?
Are you at a point in your life where you are just existing and need to start living again?
Regina's Question:
Regina would like to move past her sadness and regret of not living the life she wanted.
Regina's Key Insights and Aha's:
● There is a part of her that doesn't want to "be" anymore
● She doesn't believe we get more than one love in our lives
● She beats herself up a lot
● She knows if she could create a negative story for herself she is capable of creating a positive story too
How to get over it and on with it:
● Make a choice to start creating a future which is enlivening
● Give yourself permission to live
● Speak to yourself like a loving mother would to a child
● Write out some promises you will keep to yourself
Tools and Takeaways:
● Practice self-love
● Consider that loved ones who have transitioned are angels and guides in your life
● Accept that you did the best you could with the tools you had at the time
Resources:
Transcript
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| 0:00.0 | Welcome to Over It and On With It. I'm your host Christine Hasler and for over a decade I've been a life coach, speaker, and author. |
| 0:10.0 | Each week you'll hear me work directly with a caller as I coach them through a goal they want to accomplish or an obstacle they may be facing. |
| 0:16.0 | I'll provide a blend of practical and spiritual advice as well as tangible actions you can apply to your own life. |
| 0:22.0 | Now let's get on with the episode. |
| 0:24.0 | Hi everybody and welcome back. |
| 0:31.0 | Thank you again for being here. I just love having you here and |
| 0:35.2 | just feeling so grateful for this opportunity to connect and to share and this wouldn't be possible I wouldn't be doing what |
| 0:46.1 | I'm doing if it wasn't for a very significant person in my life and I wanted to |
| 0:51.5 | start the show by telling you a little bit about her today. |
| 0:55.0 | So when I was 23 years old, I was working at Paramount Pictures and I was in a relationship that was unhealthy and I was sitting at lunch with my friend Kristen complaining again and again and about this boyfriend of mine and I think I was taking Xanax just to deal with it and she'd been |
| 1:15.2 | hearing me talk about it a lot and she's like look I don't know what to tell you I |
| 1:18.8 | can't really listen to this anymore but I just went and saw this kind of cookie therapist slash coach. |
| 1:24.9 | I don't really know what she is. |
| 1:26.4 | Her name is Mona, and she was actually really helpful, |
| 1:29.0 | so maybe you want to go see her. |
| 1:31.0 | And I would have done anything at that point. |
| 1:33.0 | And I'm like, all right, fine, like I'm just looking for answers, I'm looking for relief, I'm |
| 1:36.6 | so miserable that I need some help. |
| 1:40.3 | So I drove out to Sherman Oaks, which was a stretch for me, drove out to Sherman Oaks, and those in California will get that joke. |
| 1:47.0 | And went to her house, which is where she saw people, and I walked in her house and I was like, |
| 1:51.0 | oh my gosh, is this woman trapped in 1989 I mean the decorations and |
| 1:55.2 | the men of Chatschis that she had was kind of unbelievable and I thought |
... |
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