071: Ask David — Expressing Anger, Narcissistic Bosses, Social Media Bullying

Feeling Good Podcast | TEAM-CBT - The New Mood Therapy

David Burns, MD

Clinical, Therapy, Anxiety, Psychotherapy, Depression, Health & Fitness, Cognitive, Mentalhealth, Mental Health, Behavior, Education, Self-improvement, Psychology, Relationships, Addiction, Happiness, Personalgrowth

4.4 • 856 Ratings

🗓️ 15 January 2018

⏱️ 32 minutes

🔗️ Recording | iTunes | RSS

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Summary

What do I do if I am using the Five Secrets and I feel angry? If I use the Disarming Technique, isn't there a danger that I might not express my own feelings? And isn't this the same as your "Hidden Emotion" Model, where we don't express our feelings due to excessive niceness?
How would you use the Five Secrets if you're attacked in public by a narcissistic boss? Should you use the Disarming Technique? Won't that make you look weak? Should you only use the Five Secrets in one-on-one situations?
Why is the Self-Monitoring technique rarely effective?
How would you help young people who are being bullied in social media?

Transcript

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0:00.0	Hello and welcome to the Feeling Good podcast.
0:12.4	I am your host, Fabrice Nye.
0:14.7	And joining me here in the Murrieta Studios is Dr. David Burns.
0:19.0	Hi, David.
0:20.0	Hi, Fabrice.
0:23.8	Dr. David Burns has been a pioneer in the development of cognitive therapy, and he is the creator of the new team therapy. He is the author of
0:30.2	Feeling Good, which has sold over 5 million copies in the United States, and has been translated into
0:35.5	over 20 languages. He is an emeritus adjunct clinical professor
0:40.0	of psychiatry at the Stanford University School of Medicine. Welcome to episode 71 of the
0:47.2	Feeling Good podcast. And David, we've gotten some comments on our Five Secrets series, and we'll address a couple of those today.
1:02.0	In fact, if you don't mind, I'd like to read a little bit of a praise to start with.
1:08.0	We got something from Rose who said about the Five Secrets.
1:13.4	This is very insightful.
1:14.4	I have a teammate who is a complainer.
1:17.3	I will try this disarming technique.
1:19.9	You're so generous to share this jam with us.
1:22.9	And Rose, if you can get back to us after you try it, we'd be great. We'd love it to hear what you have to say.
1:31.2	So here's a question from Johnny.
1:34.4	He says, Hi, David.
1:36.4	I'm really enjoying the series on the Five Secrets of Effective Communication.
1:40.9	I had a query about disarming.
1:43.5	It seems to me that it could be easy to fall into the trap of the unexpressed emotion model.
	...

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