Welcome to the Daily Dad podcast, where we provide one lesson every single day to help you with your most important job, being a parent.

I'm Ryan Holiday, and I draw these lessons from ancient philosophy, modern psychology, practical wisdom, and insights from

parents just like you all over the world. Thank you for listening, and we hope this helps.

Your kids say nothing about you. It's natural to tie your identity to things your kids do,

to think they are a mirrored reflection of you,

to believe their successes and failures say something about you.

But you have to resist this.

The philosopher Stillpo had a daughter who had a bad reputation. We don't know what for,

but someone once tried to shame him because of it. And his reply is worthy of sharing. She is no

more a disgrace to me than I am an honor to her. While this might seem a little detached or

unparrently, in fact, it's the healthiest and most

respectful approach for a parent to have. Your kids are their own people. If they succeed and go to a

great college and make a lot of money, that's because they worked hard and got there. It really

doesn't say anything about you at all. If they mess up, it's because they messed up. Doesn't say

you're a bad parent, because it's not fair to you or them. If they mess up, it's because they messed up. Doesn't say you're a bad parent,

because it's not fair to you or them. Let the mistake be a mistake, nothing more, nothing less.

And yes, of course, our job is to care for them, love them, provide for them, and teach them the right

lessons. But don't associate what they do, what they wear, whether they're the cool kid at school or a little awkward,

their self. Being a parent is part of your identity. It has to be. But you must avoid identifying

your kid's success or lack of success with yourself. As we've said, let them be their own people.

Love them the same always, no matter what happens or how things go.

Hey, thanks for listening to the Daily Dad podcast. You can get this via email every day as well

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