This is the BBC World Service. I am Santa Safi and welcome to World of Wisdom where we explore self-help for the spirit.

People reassess their values, look for new ways to cope in a crisis, or simply want to get the best out of themselves.

In this series of programs, we look at ways that may help them. Coping with bereavement is a part of life and

there are many approaches to addressing the deep pain of losing someone close to you.

A concoumni from Nigeria is suffering.

Dr. Shefali is a therapist, an author from India,

and she offered him advice. Here is a shortened version of their

conversation. My mother and sister died last year. I was very close to both of them and their dates have affected me

deeply. They were the two people I went to for support and I spoke to them

almost every day. Now they are not here.

I wake up every day with every heart and every mind.

Yet I still find the need to get answer to that question. how does God feel? How does it feel when we go to pain in this world?

Is it something that he does for his pleasure or does he feel the pain for us?

So that is the major thing that I've been trying to get answer to.

So since they have died, you've been searching for an answer as to why this happens why does

God allow this to happen is that correct absolutely and now you feel when it's apple.

And I've been looking for people to give me an answer to that.

And what have people been saying that doesn't feel right for you?

The answer given by many people is not something that I subscribe to.

Gold does anything he likes.

So whenever we go through something traumatic like you have gone through, it's very natural for us to question our faith and look for answers on the

outside which is what you're doing.

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