This is the BBC World Service.

I'm Sanasathi and welcome to World of Wisdom,

where we explore some of the personal issues

that life turns up.

The idea of self-expression, of discovering yourself,

of learning to be the person you truly are,

will seem obviously a good thing to many of you listening,

not even worthy of debate.

But those of us who have grown up in traditional cultures

know that it is not so straightforward.

For women, especially, deciding to cut to your own path

in life can involve some very difficult choices.

So it is with Falaki, a wonderfully bright young woman

from Benin.

She is a university student who feels

she has been pushed down a path she did not choose for herself.

She spoke to Dr. Shefali, who is the author

of a radical awakening.

As the title of her book implies,

some of her advice will seem quite radical to some listeners.

Here is Falaki, asking her question

in a shortened version of their far-reaching discussion.

...