The Bugle, audio newspaper for a visual world.

Hello, Bugleers and welcome to Bugle 65 for the week beginning Monday, the 2nd of March,

2009 with me, Andy Zotsman, here in the glorious city of London, and in New York City, Mr. John Oliver.

Hello, Bugleers. Hello, Andy. Oh, you said hello to Bugleers as well.

Yeah, I've done that. So, do you see yourself as a Bugleer as well?

No, well, you know, boom. I am all things to all Bugleers, John.

Really? Big claim for the start of the Bugle, Andy. Huge claim.

It's bugle time. I'm excited to be back after a week, and can you tell?

I can't tell. Did you have a nice little break?

I did. Apologised to be with my absent last week.

I was in St Thomas in the Virgin Islands trying to de-stress myself.

I've become quite stressed. And what I did was I swam with a turtle.

And that really did the trick. And it's hard to be stressed around a turtle.

I just don't think it can be done. In fact, I think all future Middle East negotiations

should be done in a gigantic water tank with turtles swimming around.

Yes, it'd be expensive to set up, but what price piece?

That's right, did Charles Darwin ever start a war? He did not.

He did not. At no point, I made it back from my ludicrous trip to Texas

with President Clinton, as far as we've been waiting for this.

It culminated, Andy, in a five-hour dinner with him in his hotel room,

which I left at two in the morning. Just you and him.

No, it was me, the 42nd president, Natalie Portman, Matthew McConaughey,

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