Remember normal? When did being normal get cancelled?

Normal, by the way, is my gender identity. Misgender me at your peril.

What makes me normal? Well, I'm in a monotonous. mis-

at your peril.

What makes me normal?

Well, I'm in a monogamous marriage,

and I intend to stick with it until death to us part.

I'm a proud husband-sexual.

That means I'm only attracted to men who identify as my husband.

We have five children.

Each of them remains the sex they were born.

The only flag we fly has 50 stars and 13 stripes.

We are trying our best to instill Judeo-Christian American values in our kids.

You know, stuff like every human being is created in the image of God,

personal responsibility, life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness?

We hope they marry young and produce a lot of grandchildren for us to dandel on our knees one day.

Trigger warning, I also stayed home to raise my babies.

Compared to most women my age, all this makes me a radical. An extremist, or as I call myself a domestic extremist.

The funny thing is, I am not classically domestic. I bake with Duncan Hines and I loathe doing laundry. I have never crocheted

anything, darned a sock or touched a loom. I have never practiced animal husbandry.

It's too late for me to learn how to milk goats.

You're welcome, goats.

...