2D UIs in a row ridiculously high blood alcohol contents looking at jail time

A precipice of getting fired chaotic disaster that I weathered very much length to my alcoholism

It's also the only drug we know that actually makes people more aggressive. I didn't know what was going on

I started to drink more and more and more and it was really hard for me to accept that that meant that was an alcoholic

I wake up with the worst hangover alcohol used to be this social thing

I used to connect with people and go out had now become something I did nightly alone by myself

You know those situations created such a deep level of shame inside of me that I wasn't able to shake alcohol in the wake of those

Experiences

Real Lucy came out when she was drinking. I was drinking to try to take a painfully

sobriety first. I got in state sober by overcoming denial finding people to talk to being honest

Tolding myself accountable working a program and helping others and working with a sponsor

It's really only when I created a solid foundation of sobriety that I began to expand in other areas

Having a lot of time. I think a lot of people had this same sort of thing alcohol

It was just really it was good earlier and earlier. Yeah easier and easier to go to it was a situation in which no matter what I did

It you didn't quite get the validation that you were seeking so you're always chasing it a little bit more a little bit more

To the point where unbeknownst to me or on an unconscious level like I needed to escape that paradigm

And my first escape was was through drugs and alcohol

Every time I had had done something or said something that I regret it

It was when I was drinking and I thought at one point

Maybe I don't want to live a life where I'm continually wishing that I hadn't said or done something

And I just spiraled out control. I didn't care. I didn't want to live

I'd lost the passion to live because whatever is in the alcohol puts you in a bad state. I didn't care

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