Why You Become Triggered by Family During the Holidays
The Dr. Leaf Show
Dr. Caroline Leaf
4.6 • 3.2K Ratings
🗓️ 26 November 2025
⏱️ 26 minutes
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Summary
Have you ever walked into your family home for the holidays and felt yourself slipping back into old patterns—people-pleasing, shutting down, overreacting—even when you thought you’d grown past them? It’s not just psychological—it’s neurological.
In this episode, I break down the science behind why holiday visits activate dormant emotional pathways and how to stay anchored in your present identity. You’ll learn practical tools to interrupt old scripts and keep control of your mind, even when the environment tries to pull you back.
What you’ll learn in this episode:
✅ Why childhood environments trigger survival patterns in adulthood
✅ How familiar voices, smells, and rooms activate your limbic system
✅ The 3-step Holiday Grounding Plan to avoid emotional regression
✅ Simple Neurocycle® strategies to keep you in control before, during, and after visits
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DISCLAIMER: This podcast and blog are for educational purposes only and are not intended as medical advice. Please consult with a professional for personalized support.
#HolidayRegression #FamilyTriggers #NeuroscienceOfStress #MindManagement #HelpInAHurry #Neurocycle #EmotionalHealth #HolidayAnxiety #FamilyDynamics
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Transcript
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| 0:00.0 | Returning to childhood environments during the holidays activates dormant emotional patterns, |
| 0:06.0 | people pleasing, shutdown, conflict avoidance or overreaction. |
| 0:10.3 | This isn't just psychological, it's neurological. |
| 0:13.3 | Stresses, light up your limbic system and suppress your prefrontal cortex, |
| 0:17.9 | pulling you back into old, unresolved identity loops. |
| 0:21.8 | That's why so many adults feel ashamed of how they act or react when they are home. |
| 0:27.2 | This episode unpacks the brain science of holiday regression and offers practical ways to |
| 0:32.4 | stay grounded in your present-day self. |
| 0:35.6 | Have you ever noticed the moment you walk into your family's house for the holidays? |
| 0:39.9 | Your mind starts dismantling the adult you and activating a version of you that you thought |
| 0:44.6 | had healed. |
| 0:45.9 | If you don't know how to stop it, you'll walk out days later wondering why you acted like |
| 0:50.8 | someone you swore you'd outgrown. |
| 0:53.4 | This isn't just a shift in mood. |
| 0:55.3 | It's neuroscience working against you. |
| 0:58.3 | Every year, millions of adults leave family gatherings frustrated with themselves, |
| 1:03.5 | believing they failed some personal test or, |
| 1:05.9 | but in truth their brain was in old script from decades ago. |
| 1:09.5 | Familiar voices, smells, even the way the light hits the living room. |
| 1:13.7 | And these activations are so powerful that they override the mind's capacity for reasoning and self-control, |
| 1:19.9 | leading two reactions that take you back to your teenage years. But here's the thing. You can't keep |
| 1:25.7 | that from happening and you don't need years of therapy to do it. |
... |
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