Why People Don’t Hear You — And How to Fix It

Hello Monday with Jessi Hempel

Careers, Business

4.8 • 1.1K Ratings

🗓️ 11 August 2025

⏱️ 33 minutes

🔗️ Recording | iTunes | RSS

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Summary

We’ve all had conversations that go sideways. Not because we said the wrong thing, but because we weren’t speaking the same language. In this week’s episode of Hello Monday, Jessi Hempel sits down with Charles Duhigg, the Pulitzer Prize-winning journalist and bestselling author, to unpack the science of great communication. Charles's latest book, Supercommunicators, explores how anyone—yes, anyone—can get better at having meaningful, impactful conversations. Whether you’re pitching an idea at work or trying to connect more deeply at home, Charles offers tools to help you bridge the gap between intention and understanding. Jessi and Charles discuss: The three types of conversations: practical, emotional, and social—and how to recognize them Why most of us are bad at predicting how conversations will go Why listening in real time matters more than planning what to say How to practice your way into being a better communicator How to talk so people will listen and listen so others feel heard This is a must-listen for anyone who wants to communicate more clearly, build stronger relationships, or become a better leader. Continue the conversation with us at Hello Monday Office Hours! We’re live on the LinkedIn News page every Wednesday at 3 PM ET.

Transcript

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0:00.0	LinkedIn News.
0:06.0	Whenever I give speeches, I do this experiment where I ask everyone in the audience to turn to the person next to them and ask and answer one question.
0:13.9	When is the last time you cried in front of another person?
0:17.0	There's 10,000 engineers in the room.
0:19.7	And then I ask, who's excited about this?
0:21.5	And nobody's excited, right?
0:22.6	They all think this is going to be terrible.
0:24.3	And then I asked them how it went.
0:25.9	How many people had a better conversation than you expected?
0:28.6	Every hand goes up.
0:30.0	We're bad at anticipating how conversations will go.
0:33.2	Right.
0:33.8	But the more we have them, the better our prognostication becomes.
0:40.5	From the news team at LinkedIn, I'm Jesse Hempel, and this is Hello Monday.
0:44.9	It's our show about the changing nature of work and how that work is changing us.
0:51.1	I learned one of my most important lessons about communication when I was about seven years old.
0:56.6	I got into this fight with my sister.
0:59.1	She was probably four, give or take, and I got so frustrated with her that I just walloped her.
1:05.6	Now she started crying, and I was a bigger kid than her.
1:08.4	I'm not proud of it.
1:09.8	I heard her, and so I apologized. She cried harder, and I apologized again. I was a bigger kid than her. I'm not proud of it. I heard her. And so I apologized. She cried harder. And I apologized again. So she ran and told mom and I ran and said to mom, hey, I'm sorry. I told her I was sorry. And she said to me, well, it doesn't matter what you said to her. It matters what she heard. Now, this is one of the most important lessons
1:30.0	in communication, right? It matters not what you said, but what another person heard. My question
	...

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