Why narcissists can bring up YOUR past but you can't bring up THEIRS
The Mental Healness Podcast
Lee Hammock
4.9 • 1.2K Ratings
🗓️ 12 October 2025
⏱️ 11 minutes
🧾️ Download transcript
Summary
Why do narcissists constantly bring up YOUR past but won't allow you to bring up theirs? In this episode, I explain the double standard that exists in narcissistic relationships and why toxic people use your past as a weapon against you - even things that happened before you met them.
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I'm Lee & I've been diagnosed with narcissistic personality disorder ( NPD ). I've been in therapy since 2017 & It has definitely changed my life because without it, I would have lost everything. My platform is dedicated to giving you the WHYs behind the things that Narcissists do. I'm not here to diagnose ANYONE or to tell you to leave your relationship. I'm just trying to give you the information to make your own informed decisions
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Transcript
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| 0:00.0 | So why are narcissists consistently bringing up the past, but you can't do it right? |
| 0:07.6 | That's what we're talking about today, y'all, why narcissistic people, toxic people like to |
| 0:12.5 | consistently and constantly bring up the past, but won't allow you to do the same thing. |
| 0:22.0 | Of course, if you knew here, my name is Lee Hammack. |
| 0:24.7 | I'm a diagnosed narcissist. |
| 0:26.4 | And welcome to another episode of the Narcissiscuit, y'all, which will be transitioning |
| 0:30.4 | to the mental illness podcast here pretty soon because the interviews are on the way, y'all. |
| 0:35.0 | The interviews are on the way. |
| 0:36.9 | You're going to apply to be on the podcast |
| 0:39.3 | the link is in the description of every video that i do but yes let's hop right into it y'all |
| 0:44.6 | the past is a tool that narcissists use to build a like a house of protection right a house |
| 0:53.4 | of worship and whatnot. |
| 0:55.4 | Why do they keep bringing up the past so much? |
| 0:58.6 | Simply put, because it works. |
| 1:02.2 | Because it's useful. |
| 1:04.4 | Bringing up the past is absolutely a useful tool for narcissistic people. |
| 1:13.9 | It really just is. It can be as simple as that right there sometimes. That the past, I can always use it. And this is why I tell people, like when you're |
| 1:19.9 | getting to know somebody, fill them out. Don't just go trauma dumping on them. Don't just be sharing |
| 1:27.0 | your deep emotional past with this person |
| 1:30.3 | don't share your deepest darkest secrets with this person like build up to that make them |
| 1:36.6 | earn your information earn it like your info yeah y'all make them earn it because they will |
| 1:43.6 | absolutely bring up the past against you. |
... |
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