Why Men Cheat
ManTalks Podcast
Connor Beaton
4.8 • 591 Ratings
🗓️ 3 July 2025
⏱️ 14 minutes
🧾️ Download transcript
Summary
Talking points: relationships, infidelity
Not the happiest of talking points today, team, but it's always worth discussing. There's no universal reason for it, but from my own experience and years of working with men, I've seen some common themes. Here's a quick breakdown of the top reasons, plus the underlying motivation for almost every man that's knocked on my door.
(00:00:00) - Intro, and the underlying motivation for a majority of men
(00:03:40) - Reasons that fall into this category
(00:10:53) - One of the main drivers for my own infidelity, and how attachment styles can play into it
***
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Mentioned in this episode:
Self Worth
Transcript
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| 0:00.0 | Why do men cheat? Why are men unfaithful? Why do they have affairs and step out of the relationship? |
| 0:12.4 | You might be asking yourself, why am I even getting this? The answers are obvious. But the truth is that |
| 0:18.2 | if you're a man that has ever been unfaithful and you have cheated, it's not always so obvious. In fact, most of the men that I work with and that come to me because they are having an affair or because some infidelity has been found out or they're struggling with it and their partner doesn't know. One of the first things they say to me is, |
| 0:37.7 | I don't know why I did this. Tell me why I, help me figure out why I had this affair. You know, |
| 0:44.4 | did I just want the attention? Like, are things really that bad in my relationship? For a lot of |
| 0:48.9 | men that have affairs, the question, why did I do this? Is actually quite prominent. So I'm going to |
| 0:54.1 | give you some of the |
| 0:55.0 | main reasons based on research and based on my own personal experience with the men that I've |
| 1:00.2 | worked with in my own life about why we as men cheat. And I'm going to give you a little bit of |
| 1:06.0 | insight and direction into how we need to move past some of these pieces. So years ago, I spoke at this conference |
| 1:13.7 | and this sex therapist was talking before me and she had condensed down why men cheat, |
| 1:19.7 | why women cheat into this beautiful phrase, which was men cheat to stay and women cheat to leave. |
| 1:29.7 | Men cheat to stay and women cheat to leave. Men cheat to stay and women cheat to leave. |
| 1:33.9 | So generally speaking, I have seen this to be true. |
| 1:40.0 | On average, the majority of men that have affairs or that are cheating, they are cheating to stay. |
| 1:41.4 | Now, what does that mean? |
| 1:42.5 | It means that they don't want the relationship that the primary |
| 1:46.6 | relationship that they're in to end. They don't want the divorce to happen. They don't want the |
| 1:51.6 | relationship to be over. But the affair happens anyways, whereas with women, oftentimes cheating |
| 1:57.8 | is a sign that she is either emotionally, sexually, physically, |
| 2:02.9 | intellectually out of the relationship. She's done with it in some capacity she wants to leave. |
| 2:09.0 | That's not every single time, but for a lot of women, it's a sign that she's wanting to leave |
... |
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