meta_pixel
Tapesearch Logo
Log in
The Happiness Lab with Dr. Laurie Santos

Why It Hurts to Hold a Grudge — and How to Let Go with Dr. Fred Luskin

The Happiness Lab with Dr. Laurie Santos

Pushkin Industries

Society & Culture, Health & Fitness

4.714.8K Ratings

🗓️ 6 April 2026

⏱️ 42 minutes

🧾️ Download transcript

Summary

Forgiveness might sound simple, but it's hard to let go of the anger that comes with being deeply hurt. Grudges, bitterness, and frustration with life’s unfairness can quietly build up over time and take a real toll on our mental and physical health.

As The Happiness Lab kicks off a new season on spring cleaning your wellbeing, Dr. Laurie sits down with psychologist Dr. Fred Luskin, director of the Stanford University Forgiveness Project, to explore what research says about forgiveness. Why is letting go of resentment so much harder than it sounds? And what does it really mean to forgive someone?

Plus, we revisit a powerful story from the archives that shows what forgiveness can look like in the face of profound loss and why it might be the most radical act of self-care we can take.

Experts Referenced:

  • Dr. Fred Luskin, psychologist and director of the Stanford Forgiveness Projects
  • Miroslav Volf, Professor of Theology at Yale Divinity School and founder of the Yale Center for Faith & Culture
  • Katy Milkman, Professor at The Wharton School, University of Pennsylvania

Resources Mentioned: 

Related Episodes:

See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Transcript

Click on a timestamp to play from that location

0:00.0

Pushkin.

0:10.8

Hey, Happiness Lab listeners.

0:14.8

It's finally spring, a season that's all about renewal and new beginnings.

0:19.9

And, of course, spring cleaning. As the

0:22.5

weather gets a little warmer, we naturally get the itch to begin rejuvenating. This is the time of

0:27.8

year when we say yes to clearing out our closets and refreshing our homes. It does feel great to

0:33.3

freshen up our physical spaces. But could we take a similar approach to refreshing our well-being?

0:38.8

Could we turn that spring-cleaning urge towards pruning our junky habits or sweeping out our

0:43.3

negative thought patterns? We usually think of January 1st and the start of the new year as the time

0:48.4

for goals like these, but studies have shown that the beginning of spring is also a great time for a

0:53.7

happiness restart.

0:55.3

Take one of my favorite studies by my friend, the psychologist Katie Milkman.

0:59.6

She recruited a group of people who said they had a personal goal that they'd been putting off

1:03.4

for a while. She then offered them the chance to receive a formal reminder that it was

1:07.8

finally time to get started. Half the participants were offered this formal

1:11.8

reminder on some random day of the year, but the other half was offered that reminder on a day that felt

1:17.3

like a new beginning, the first day of spring. What did Katie find? Well, more than three times as

1:23.0

many people wanted to tackle their goal on the first day of spring rather than on some random day.

1:28.3

I love these results because they show that our minds are always on the lookout for what Katie

1:32.4

calls, temporal fresh starts, those special moments during the year when our motivation to make

1:37.6

positive changes gets a boost. So in this new season of the Happiness Lab, we'll be harnessing

1:43.3

the motivational power of springtime.

...

Please login to see the full transcript.

Disclaimer: The podcast and artwork embedded on this page are from Pushkin Industries, and are the property of its owner and not affiliated with or endorsed by Tapesearch.

Generated transcripts are the property of Pushkin Industries and are distributed freely under the Fair Use doctrine. Transcripts generated by Tapesearch are not guaranteed to be accurate.

Copyright © Tapesearch 2026.