Why Is It So Hard to Make Friends?

The Fr. Mike Schmitz Catholic Podcast

Ascension

Christianity, Religion & Spirituality, Society & Culture

4.9 • 7.1K Ratings

🗓️ 20 June 2019

⏱️ 8 minutes

🔗️ Recording | iTunes | RSS

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Summary

Fr. Mike is honest about why it’s so hard for us to make friends. A necessity for friendship is time, something that many of us simply don’t have. More than that, true friendship requires a painful level of vulnerability and transparency. When asking yourself who you are willing to be friends with, you’re really asking “Who are you willing to give access to your wounds?”

With that in mind, consider what Jesus said:

“No longer do I call you servants, for the servant does not know what his master is doing; but I have called you friends, for all that I have heard from my Father I have made known to you” (John 15:15).

How much time do you spend with Jesus? Will you give him access to your wounds? This is afterall what it means to be a friend. Are you a friend of Jesus?

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Transcript

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0:00.0	How are you?
0:05.6	Hi, my name is Father Mike Schmitz and this is The Scent of Resents.
0:08.7	So a couple of years ago, I read an article that talked about basically saying the crisis
0:14.2	of loneliness.
0:16.0	They were specifically highlighting the fact that there are many middle-aged men, roughly
0:23.0	my age, or an older, who experienced a great degree of loneliness.
0:28.1	They would maintain that it maybe is even an unprecedented level of loneliness or friendlessness.
0:34.4	And it wasn't that these men are these people in general because it's not just men.
0:38.0	People in general didn't have people in their lives.
0:41.4	It's not that they weren't busy.
0:43.6	It's not that they didn't have family.
0:45.5	It was that they lacked the ability or the opportunity to enter into deep friendship with
0:53.2	anyone in their lives.
0:54.2	I imagine that if you're watching this, you probably have experienced that as well.
0:58.6	We've done videos on loneliness and other videos on what is to be a friend.
1:03.0	But why is it that friendlessness is so prevalent right now?
1:10.8	I think there's at least two kind of enemies, I guess, of friendliness, two enemies that
1:18.6	contribute to friendlessness.
1:20.9	I think the first one is maybe the most obvious.
1:26.1	Friendships grow over time.
1:27.4	In fact, friendships need time to exist because I know for myself that I can be so busy.
1:35.6	And this is the thing, you're probably so busy, too busy to have any friends.
	...

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