Alright, we're rolling. Welcome to Jeff Femme, ladies and gentlemen. This is the Jeff Financial Masterclass.

We are financial advisors over here. We're going to be giving you tons of tips on how to get rich quick.

You don't have to work hard. You just follow this quick 10-step program. It's about 1500 bucks.

You know what you sign up right now.

Do you change that up every time you change up what the FM is?

Bro, don't act like you don't watch this show. You guys are my fucking biggest fans.

He was just listening to the intro for the first time, like, oh, that's pretty good.

Okay, stop. We are on the crisis that may have been caused by China.

Do you mind if I'm not going to get into it? I'm not mad at that. I've been going through a lot of stuff lately.

And you know what? I'm just going to open up today.

I'm going to run this guy's on the show here, but I'm going to talk about myself for a little bit.

This is Jeff Femme. Look at the name on the wall.

Hold on a damn second. What is that? I'm your shelf. What are you going to do that?

Do you see that? What? That horse in the carriage that's broken.

Doesn't look familiar.

Did you steal something from his Christmas village?

I didn't just steal it. I vandalized it. And then I fucking stole it.

And then I put it on my shelf as a souvenir.

And it's been here for months and nobody's realized it.

I came right in your house. I saw your little Christmas setup and I was jealous.

So I smashed it up.

You did not smash it up.

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