The promise that I issue to you is that by one o'clock today, you will know more than you do now.

LBC 97.3 Mystery Hour with James O'Brien.

Three minutes after 12, mystery hour is upon us.

If you're wondering what all the excitement is about, both here and indeed on Twitter,

then just take it from me that that promise is kosher. You will know more by 1 o'clock then you do now.

Whether or not it's knowledge that you are subsequently grateful for, I cannot guarantee,

but I guarantee that the sum total of your knowledge will be increased in the course of the next 54 minutes.

And the way I do that, the way we do that,

is by inviting you to ask any question you please.

0845-6060973 as the number you need,

and waiting for your fellow listeners to answer it.

It only really has two rules, doesn't it?

I think the first is dullness, always guard against

dullness, never be dull, never be boring. And that's a subjective perspective inevitably.

So we will decide whether or not your question is boring. And if the women answering the

phone don't sound very enthusiastic about your question, the chances are it's really boring and they're too polite to say so.

I wish I could answer the phones. I'd tell you straight. What a rubbish question.

Jog on, but they're too nice to do that.

If you detect a certain reticence, a reluctance and absence of enthusiasm in their dulcet tones,

come on, take the hint.

And the second reason for exclusion is simple repetition. If you've got a question to which you desperately need an answer, but we can remember both asking and answering it relatively recently, then you will probably be invited very politely to sling your hook as well. If you hear somebody else ask a question to which you do know the answer, there are, I don't think, any circumstances in which we wouldn't welcome you onto the switchboard. So let's get that switchboard open. 0845-6060973 is the number. Anything goes, pretty much. Dolness and repetition, notwithstanding, as I've just explained. But the other thing that's worth pointing out is that I try and indeed tend not to rely upon any mode of communication during this hour except the phones.

It gets so bonkers busy on the phones that I don't really have time.

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